Who could resist the chance of a Sag season ticket with all this to look forward to?
"It has been a bit of a chore this season and I've had my doubts about getting a ST next year.
You are right, it's not really even about the football. It's about the match day experience.
As I walk in the Mem gates I see 2 poor ladies stood wet and freezing selling programmes in all weather.
I make my way towards the Clubhouse bar where if I'm lucky I can fight my way past 100 smokers to squeeze into a tiny toilet for a quick wazz.
I take a look at the queue for the bar which stretches back to the door and don't even bother. Maybe I could stand outside in the wind and rain and buy one from the back of a horse box? On second thoughts....
I then think about having a browse in the club shop before I realize that it's inside a part of the ground I can't access after 2pm. And even when I'm early its tiny entrance allows for one person in or out at at a time. Then there is no where to try anything on. Not that they have any stock of anything you'd want. Especially just before Xmas.
So I make my way over to the Young Pirates cabin. Occasionally I will buy some sweets for HTY, but normally I just put his name in the draw ticket box in the hope he wins the chance to be the mascot. To be honest I try not to spend too long in the YP cabin, it really smells bad.
Once I've done that I make my way down through the turnstile that is so small I have to lift my rucksack over my head to get through and make my way down to the tent end.
Oh, what's that? It's another trailer outside in the rain where I can buy a beer.....nah, you're alright.
Next stop, the pasty hut. During my 20 minute wait behind 10 people I look at the posters on the doors. Ooh look. Pie of the day is Turkey and Cranberry. That sounds nice.
When I eventually get to the front of the queue I am greeted by a young person who is on their first day. (No joke, we have had a new staff member in the SS pasty hut nearly every single week). They inform me that they do not actually have any of the pies advertised and they proceed to list all the food they have this week. Just like the vendor, it seems we have to have new pies every week at the pasty hut too. God only knows why we can't just make a decision on what food to sell.
So, I order my pie and more in hope than anything else I ask what the Meal Deal options are. We all know it's out of date cheese and onion crisps and a twix. They never have anything else anymore. I politely decline and then help the server add up the cost of 2 pies and a tea before then helping them work out the change from a tenner.
I then make my way to sit in a lovely prefab tent, that's windy and freezing bloody cold all year round.
Now I come to think about it, what's not to like? When can I renew my Season Ticket again?
FTG"