How did you meet your partner?

[Up The City!]

On 29/03/2018 at 20:35, ziderheadarmy said:

Getting here back to Bristol or even someone else in Ireland or anywhere with out the “clock” about is your best move.

That sid by her age she should be wise / mature enough to see “clock” for what he is.

I’m a great believer in if it’s mesnt to be it will happen. I would just throw out a open invite and leave the ball in her court.

ps @Up The City! I want your job! 

 

21 hours ago, Captain Hindsight said:

@Up The City! you just need to get her over this way and then go for a good steak and let her know how things are.

If you’re shy, then it’ll go down even better.

Epic.

Small Update. 

She went to my friends today for a cuppa and she decided to video chat me for a good hour or so whilst there. Same old banter between us and she was trying to convince me to come back over by saying her fence needs fixing and her washing machine and tap and that I’ll be missing out on the Easter Parade (we went to paddy’s day parade together)

Since I got back I’ve not been in contact with her as as I’m sort of at the point where I need to get on with my life but at the same time get her to miss me.

Shared a few texts after about my jumper that I left there for her, she wears it all the time and wears it to bed at night. This girl is clearly madly in love with me but just won’t allow herself to go for it.

The plan is in about a month I’m just going to go over and surprise her.

She did joke in the video chat that if I paid for her to come over she would.

 

 

[Up The City!]

6 minutes ago, ziderheadarmy said:

Why should you have to pay? 

I don’t think they were being serious at all about me playing. It’s just the way we are with each other. Like the other day we was walking through the woods and I had a can of coke, I asked her to hold it for a second whilst I tied my laces, I then proceeded to have a cigarette instead. Could give many more examples but basically we are always doing things like that to each other.

[Up The City!]

Facing a dilemma now 

Since returning to England our convos have really tailed off. We chat very briefly every couple of days. Things are still really good between us tho. But I’m kind of at the point where struggling to think of reasons to contact her.

Ive had a good think and I’ve thought tbh I’ve probably been as confusing as she has been. I also promised things and never followed through. My reason being that I was just too shy to but having thought about it, that’s probs her reason Aswell. I know I moan about the cock blocker but also I did things with my friends and not with her. I suppose it’s easier to organise and do things with people your comfortable with.

When we are together and around people we are comfortable in each other’s company but act like teenagers. Most of our conversations are quite jokey. In the brief times we did get alone together we actually got on really well and the conversations flowed. 

The problem is that we are both too shy to take the initiative, personally I feel well if she wants to spend time alone together the she would ask, and that’s the approach I took in Ireland. But now I’m thinking they probably thought the same about me! 

So my dilemma is, do I just bin this or do I go back to Ireland and properly go for it this time? A good start would be by knocking on her front door for a cup of tea! 

[Mike Hunt-Hertz]

I used to be painfully shy. You need to just think "**** this shit", and grasp the nettle....it's what I did, and have been fairly confident since. Faint heart never won fair maiden etc etc

[ZiderEyed]

Nowt worse than living with regrets. ******* go for it.

[One BCFC]

On 09/04/2018 at 06:46, Up The City! said:

Facing a dilemma now 

Since returning to England our convos have really tailed off. We chat very briefly every couple of days. Things are still really good between us tho. But I’m kind of at the point where struggling to think of reasons to contact her.

Ive had a good think and I’ve thought tbh I’ve probably been as confusing as she has been. I also promised things and never followed through. My reason being that I was just too shy to but having thought about it, that’s probs her reason Aswell. I know I moan about the cock blocker but also I did things with my friends and not with her. I suppose it’s easier to organise and do things with people your comfortable with.

When we are together and around people we are comfortable in each other’s company but act like teenagers. Most of our conversations are quite jokey. In the brief times we did get alone together we actually got on really well and the conversations flowed. 

The problem is that we are both too shy to take the initiative, personally I feel well if she wants to spend time alone together the she would ask, and that’s the approach I took in Ireland. But now I’m thinking they probably thought the same about me! 

So my dilemma is, do I just bin this or do I go back to Ireland and properly go for it this time? A good start would be by knocking on her front door for a cup of tea! 

Start meeting other girls i'd say.

[Cotham Brow Red]

On 09/04/2018 at 06:46, Up The City! said:

Facing a dilemma now 

Since returning to England our convos have really tailed off. We chat very briefly every couple of days. Things are still really good between us tho. But I’m kind of at the point where struggling to think of reasons to contact her.

Ive had a good think and I’ve thought tbh I’ve probably been as confusing as she has been. I also promised things and never followed through. My reason being that I was just too shy to but having thought about it, that’s probs her reason Aswell. I know I moan about the cock blocker but also I did things with my friends and not with her. I suppose it’s easier to organise and do things with people your comfortable with.

When we are together and around people we are comfortable in each other’s company but act like teenagers. Most of our conversations are quite jokey. In the brief times we did get alone together we actually got on really well and the conversations flowed. 

The problem is that we are both too shy to take the initiative, personally I feel well if she wants to spend time alone together the she would ask, and that’s the approach I took in Ireland. But now I’m thinking they probably thought the same about me! 

So my dilemma is, do I just bin this or do I go back to Ireland and properly go for it this time? A good start would be by knocking on her front door for a cup of tea! 

Mate. I totally get your situation as i have been in this same boat. It takes over your life and consumes you. Its the thought of "what if" and thats what makes you constantly try to chase. Sorry to say it never works out that way unless you are insanely lucky. 

You obviously like her and she obviously likes you but not necessarily in the way you might think. She maybe confused but its important to not try and understand her as you wont...you can never understand what goes through womens heads .

Live in the moment and not think about what happened yesterday and not think what might happen tomorrow. Live for now and now only and trust your intuition. There may have been many opportunities lost with others that you have not noticed as your to engrossed in analysing and planning over "her". Step back a bit and let life happen. What is meant to be will be. If she is interested then it will happen.

Good luck mate.

 

[exAtyeoMax]

On 13/09/2017 at 09:07, RedM said:

Most of you seem to have met people whilst drunk, I feel left out here as I met my now husband on what was I guess a very early form of social media, way back in 1983. I bet none of you can guess how we met!

CB Radio?

[RedM]

4 hours ago, exAtyeoMax said:

CB Radio?

It was indeed!

[Clevedon Red]

10 hours ago, RedM said:

It was indeed!

Copy that 10 4

[RedM]

8 hours ago, Clevedon Red said:

Copy that 10 4

As with everything, there were people who took this very seriously with all the lingo and that, or people who were usually amature radio users using the frequencies and having very technically deep discussions, but as for me and my peers we were just teenagers. It was a free (once you had purchased the equipment ) way of chatting to eachother without your parents listening. Most households only had one phone, if that, and conversations weren’t private or free. I bet teens nowadays would be horrified at that thought!

[Dollymarie]

27 minutes ago, RedM said:

 Most households only had one phone, if that, and conversations weren’t private or free. I bet teens nowadays would be horrified at that thought!

Remember that horrible noise that the house phone made if you picked it up to ring someone, and someone else was on the internet! 

Regular shouts of “get off the internet! I need to ring my friend!” In my house growing up.

Am I showing my age now? 

[RedM]

32 minutes ago, Dollymarie said:

Remember that horrible noise that the house phone made if you picked it up to ring someone, and someone else was on the internet! 

Regular shouts of “get off the internet! I need to ring my friend!” In my house growing up.

Am I showing my age now? 

Yes, and very frustrating for the person trying to phone you when the pc was on, all they would get is the engaged tone. Drove my Dad mad it did, ‘ you been on that bloody computer again haven’t you. I been trying to ring you all evening’ ‘ Is everything alright, what did you want’ ‘ Er, nothing, just a chat’ 

Good old dial up, loved the sound when your pc was trying to connect and you sat there with fingers crossed whether the connection would work or you would have to start the process again. We were early adopters of this web malarkey, cost us 1p a minute which seems nothing now but back then it wasn’t so cheap and you could easily spend £’s of an evening!

Gone a bit off subject, but you got to sit back and wonder how the hell did people communicate and contact eachother before the devices we have today. My Dad refused for years to have a telephone at home as he didn’t want his work calling him out for emergencies at night. Only when my Mum had sick elderly relatives did he get one put in, she told him either he did or she would be forced to move in with them, I guess he didn’t want her go!

[Super]

11 hours ago, Clevedon Red said:

Copy that 10 4

Roger

[Guest]

21 hours ago, RedM said:

It was indeed!

Good old eyeball! 

[WhistleHappy]

@Up the City well I've read a fair few instalments... Up until April 9th update/cliffhanger.....

As a bloke not into chick flick rom/coms etc, I think this story has the makings of a good one.... (eat your heart out Bridgett Jones!) deffo a book in it for you, whatever the ending. 

Dunno where the story has gone since April 9  ... but bet it's gonna be worth finding out, (or going to the cinema to find out/renting a Netflix video etc to find out) .....

Will check out the latest Otib updates soon (cos I just can't wait for the Hollywood screen version to come out), ..

OTIB read it here first! before some publisher/filmmaker buys the rights!  ....

Hope the story developed or is developing in the way you want or hope it will go ... Good luck, @up the city gripping love story!

 

[Calculus]

6 hours ago, RedM said:

Most households only had one phone, if that, and conversations weren’t private or free. I bet teens nowadays would be horrified at that thought!

Luxory, sheer luxory.

I suppose you must be far too young to have experienced the 'party line'. That was one phone line shared with a next door neighbour. Only one party could use the phone at any one time and if you picked up the receiver (handset) when they were on the phone you could listen in.

[Maesknoll Red]

6 hours ago, Dollymarie said:

Remember that horrible noise that the house phone made if you picked it up to ring someone, and someone else was on the internet! 

Regular shouts of “get off the internet! I need to ring my friend!” In my house growing up.

Am I showing my age now? 

Wasn’t any Internet when I was growing up....  the party line was more likely to be listening in, or a crossed line, or even the switchboard operator.......

Simpler, happy days.......

[RedM]

2 hours ago, Calculus said:

Luxory, sheer luxory.

I suppose you must be far too young to have experienced the 'party line'. That was one phone line shared with a next door neighbour. Only one party could use the phone at any one time and if you picked up the receiver (handset) when they were on the phone you could listen in.

I remember the party line, but never experienced it as such. Remember getting crossed lines occasionally though where you could hear two other people having conversations, but no we never had a shared line. But without a home phone you had to chance a public call box, where mostly ladies would take up residence fir the evening armed with fags, the crossword and a pile of 2p pieces...now who’s showing he age @Dollymarie 

[Ska Junkie]

On 28/03/2018 at 16:57, Esmond Million's Bung said:

I'm in the shit our 46th wedding anniversary is Friday not Thursday!!!!!!!!!

Crikey Es, you're being harsh on yourself. If you've been married that long, you're doing well to remember the month let alone the day! 

[Esmond Million's Bung]

5 hours ago, Ska Junkie said:

Crikey Es, you're being harsh on yourself. If you've been married that long, you're doing well to remember the month let alone the day! 

Well to be perfectly honest it actually transpired that I was right and Mrs Bung was wrong, I just never bothered to check I believed my woman because apparently only men are wrong about these things,  our anniversary was on the Thursday not the Friday like Mrs Bung kept telling me, but one thing I have learned during life's marathon is to pick my battles.

So on realising after signing and dating a letter, I told Mrs Bung to put on her Saturday night fever gear and I took her to a wonderful floating restaurant in the gulf of Morbihan and when she said "our anniversary is tomorrow and not today", I asked the waiter to bring the newspaper and told her to look at the date. I bet there are not so many husbands who can claim bragging rights for getting their wedding anniversary correct versus their wife?.

She took me out to the Irish bar on the Friday for Guinness and a gurt big homemade burger, so win/win.

[Maesknoll Red]

Blimey, I wouldn’t have a clue, when I got married, not even which year.  Not much of a romantic me......

[Ska Junkie]

45 minutes ago, Esmond Million's Bung said:

Well to be perfectly honest it actually transpired that I was right and Mrs Bung was wrong, I just never bothered to check I believed my woman because apparently only men are wrong about these things,  our anniversary was on the Thursday not the Friday like Mrs Bung kept telling me, but one thing I have learned during life's marathon is to pick my battles.

So on realising after signing and dating a letter, I told Mrs Bung to put on her Saturday night fever gear and I took her to a wonderful floating restaurant in the gulf of Morbihan and when she said "our anniversary is tomorrow and not today", I asked the waiter to bring the newspaper and told her to look at the date. I bet there are not so many husbands who can claim bragging rights for getting their wedding anniversary correct versus their wife?.

She took me out to the Irish bar on the Friday for Guinness and a gurt big homemade burger, so win/win.

Nice one Es. I bet you still paid for being right though?

[WhistleHappy]

14 hours ago, RedM said:

I remember the party line, but never experienced it as such. Remember getting crossed lines occasionally though where you could hear two other people having conversations, but no we never had a shared line. But without a home phone you had to chance a public call box, where mostly ladies would take up residence fir the evening armed with fags, the crossword and a pile of 2p pieces...now who’s showing he age @Dollymarie 

....can you remember the first time you pressed 'button B' though?    

or

....maybe you recall asking for it and being two-timed (or more) 'on the third stroke' ... ? 

[WhistleHappy]

22 hours ago, Dollymarie said:

Remember that horrible noise that the house phone made if you picked it up to ring someone, and someone else was on the internet! 

Regular shouts of “get off the internet! I need to ring my friend!” In my house growing up.

Am I showing my age now? 

Late sixties, through the seventies, the eighties and early nineties - what, erm, 'often horrible' random noise would you hear if you 'dialled 16' ?  

(clue ... "D*** -A- D***' ) 

[RedM]

5 hours ago, WhistleHappy said:

Late sixties, through the seventies, the eighties and early nineties - what, erm, 'often horrible' random noise would you hear if you 'dialled 16' ?  

(clue ... "D*** -A- D***' ) 

Dial a disc wasn’t it. If you were lucky you got half a second of the song before you had to put your money in and the song changed each day. As a kid that was one of our games we played, never put any money in just guess the song from the little bit we heard. No wonder I was so good at the Radio One Bits & Pieces roadshow game!

[Esmond Million's Bung]

18 hours ago, Maesknoll Red said:

Blimey, I wouldn’t have a clue, when I got married, not even which year.  Not much of a romantic me......

I have the reminder that our anniversary was also my late dads birthday.

[Ska Junkie]

On 15/04/2018 at 17:31, Cotham Brow Red said:

Mate. I totally get your situation as i have been in this same boat. It takes over your life and consumes you. Its the thought of "what if" and thats what makes you constantly try to chase. Sorry to say it never works out that way unless you are insanely lucky. 

You obviously like her and she obviously likes you but not necessarily in the way you might think. She maybe confused but its important to not try and understand her as you wont...you can never understand what goes through womens heads .

Live in the moment and not think about what happened yesterday and not think what might happen tomorrow. Live for now and now only and trust your intuition. There may have been many opportunities lost with others that you have not noticed as your to engrossed in analysing and planning over "her". Step back a bit and let life happen. What is meant to be will be. If she is interested then it will happen.

Good luck mate.

 

All I will say, as an Irish born person, is that we, in England, underestimate just how powerful 'family' still is in Ireland. 

I remember when my sister wanted to marry a divorcee here and all the Irish refused to accept him.  They've been married for nigh on 30 years now. 'Family' over there is all important so if you get with an Irish bird, you're getting with her whole family as well, warts 'n' all! 

[Up The City!]

On 26/04/2018 at 11:26, WhistleHappy said:

@Up the City well I've read a fair few instalments... Up until April 9th update/cliffhanger.....

As a bloke not into chick flick rom/coms etc, I think this story has the makings of a good one.... (eat your heart out Bridgett Jones!) deffo a book in it for you, whatever the ending. 

Dunno where the story has gone since April 9  ... but bet it's gonna be worth finding out, (or going to the cinema to find out/renting a Netflix video etc to find out) .....

Will check out the latest Otib updates soon (cos I just can't wait for the Hollywood screen version to come out), ..

OTIB read it here first! before some publisher/filmmaker buys the rights!  ....

Hope the story developed or is developing in the way you want or hope it will go ... Good luck, @up the city gripping love story!

 

The update is that there really isn’t an update 

We barely speak now that I’m back in England, when I was in Ireland and we wasn’t in each other’s presence we would constantly text, that faded away upon my return to England. 

Last week we had a conversation about me thinking about moving to Ireland and they think I should as it would be good for me, I’ve arranged with her to go back over in a few weeks but since making those arrangements I’m now having second thoughts.

Your right! It does have the making of a great love story and in fact I even wrote her a good old love letter last week saying about how I’ve felt about meeting her etc but I have no intention of sending it, just did it for myself really for some closure maybe. So it’s all written down already for someone to buy the script off of me  

The 1st few weeks back in England I really did miss her quite a lot, that’s faded now and now my head is clear I think do I really want to continue chasing this? Ive no doubt if we met today the crazy chemistry would still be there but i also know there would be more confusion, Rat face is still on the scene and her life is still not really in that good of a place, her and him effectively get drunk together every single night so even if I did go back to Ireland I kind of feel I’d be opening myself upto a lot of disappointment whilst wasting a lot of money. She is in no way ready for a relationship sadly. 

But whatever I had going on with her it really helped me change my outlook on life, it kind of taught me that if you want something I can get it because for a little while I did have her! So I’ve come back to England and made some major changes in my life.

I know me and her will be at least friends for life now, the biggest decision I have now is do I chance it again? Right now, based on everything I know and my experiences I’m not quite sure I have the same enthusiasm as I once did. Although that what if does niggle at me.

 

 

[Up The City!]

On 29/04/2018 at 00:56, Ska Junkie said:

All I will say, as an Irish born person, is that we, in England, underestimate just how powerful 'family' still is in Ireland. 

I remember when my sister wanted to marry a divorcee here and all the Irish refused to accept him.  They've been married for nigh on 30 years now. 'Family' over there is all important so if you get with an Irish bird, you're getting with her whole family as well, warts 'n' all! 

This! It is one of the major reasons why I want to move to Ireland. This particular family I have known for 20+ years, it’s a mix of English and Irish but the English are now just like the Irish! 

I have my own fairly large family over here but the difference is night and day, everything is about family over there. Here people are just too busy going about their every day lives. 

The majority of my time in Ireland was spent in a huge Irish kitchen drinking cups of tea with a stove to keep us warm. The minimum amount of people would have been 5 with upto 20 on some occasions. Every house I went to life centres around a kitchen table and a kettle and there was just something so warming about that because it’s totally different to here. 

On my return to England I really struggled being away from all of that and fitting back into my life. Sitting around drinking tea all day may seem pretty boring but I’ll keep those memories with me forever and I’ll constantly crave those days. To go from being around 20 people daily and being made to feel so loved and welcome to come back to England being by myself took some adjusting!

I am firmly an unofficial part of that family and that makes me feel pretty blessed. Every single one of them could see what me and this girl had between us and they were all willing us on to get together but unfortunately she doesn’t really like her family getting involved because as you likely know, everyone in Ireland knows everyone’s buisness and it kind of made her feel pressured she told me. 

Even her mother sent me some texts the other week asking if I missed her daughter etc and I replied I don’t know what your on about and then she said I’ve seen the way you look at her! I’ve also been summoned by the grand parents to take this girl and her child to see them the next time I’m over so I asked this girl why they are summoning us and she said because they will want to ask us out straight what is going on between us so that could be interesting if I ever go over.