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Football cliches and modern terms that really bug you...


WhistleHappy

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Young, reserve or returning from injury players who are described as "sniffing" around the first team. Sounds like they are puppies who are about to cock a leg and take a piss all over the manager.

players who are available to play who may have been out for a while who are said to have "handed their manager a selection headache". I don't know why but I have a hatred for that line.

Players who declare themselves fit.

When a smaller team beats a bigger team and yet the headlines the day after always have the bigger team named. I.E. If Man Utd win it's Man Utd hammer Fulham but if Man Utd lose it's "Man Utd have an off day at Fulham".

And finally, Fans who say "my club deserves success". Nope, If you've had success you deserved what you had but if it hasn't happened you obviously don't deserve it to happen just because. If your club has achieved **** all in over 70 or 80 years it doesn't mean you deserve European Football, an FA Cup final and a 20,000 all seater stadium given to you for free.

 

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9 hours ago, The Gasbuster said:

Nice one RRH.

in a similar way, reference being made to a “titanic” struggle for one of the teams playing in a match.

WTF has a ship that hit an iceberg and sank, got to do with a football match ?!

 

Titan, in Greek mythology, any of the children of Uranus (Heaven) and Gaea(Earth) and their descendants. According to Hesiod’s Theogony, there were 12 original Titans: the brothers Oceanus, Coeus, Crius, Hyperion, Iapetus, and Cronus and the sisters Thea, RheaThemisMnemosynePhoebe, and Tethys. At the instigation of Gaea the Titans rebelled against their father, who had shut them up in the underworld (Tartarus). Under the leadership of Cronus they deposed Uranus and set up Cronus as their ruler. But one of Cronus’ sons, Zeus, rebelled against his father, and a struggle then ensued between them in which most of the Titans sided with Cronus. Zeus and his brothers and sisters finally defeated the Titans after 10 years of fierce battles (the Titanomachia). The Titans were then hurled down by Zeus and imprisoned in a cavity beneath Tartarus.

Hesiod’s Works and Days preserves the idea of the Titans as the golden race, happy and long-lived. The notion developed further under the Romans—who identified Cronus with Saturn—into a golden age of peace and prosperity.

Titanic - like Titans. 

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The Chelseas, Liverpools & Man Citys (Cities?) who most clubs find it so hard to compete with. No wonder if there are more than one of em being cloned & spending multi millions X 2 on players. However, no one ever speaks of the Bristol Roverss. Just shows that they are truly unique & impossible to clone. 

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Like others I hate the whole “there was contact so it was a penalty/ he was entitled to go down” nonsense. 

The “it’s a big/massive club” thing annoys me as well. 

During tournaments like the World Cup it gets on my nerves when commentators talk in the build up to kick off about how it’s going to be a “special” game (usually when Brazil are playing as though it’s still the 1970 side) when in reality it ends up being a dull draw or a one-sided match full of “gamesmanship” (another word I dislike). 

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The one that gets my goat most is the use of the cliche 'He's a good shot-stopper' when making reference to a goalkeeper. This has been used by all and sundry, including many times on here, in the last decade or two. If I've heard it once I've heard it 20,000 times. 

Forgive me for stating the obvious, but if a keeper isn't a good shot-stopper it might be advisable for him/her to consider playing in a different position or possibly not at all.

I've actually read this sort of thing on here and other places many a time: 'He's young, he doesn't take command of his penalty area and he is suspect on crosses but he is a great shot-stopper' the inclusion of those last 7 words brings a collective 'phew!' from the audience as if that's okay then. Yet, I have never read that a potential keeper signing takes command of his area, is totally dependable with crosses, has fantastic distribution, is experienced at the top level but isn't a good shot-stopper. In fact, I've never heard or read of any keeper in the last two decades being a bad shot-stopper. Our current Kiwi keeper received a lot of flack this week for his performance v Ipswich but not one person criticised his ability to save shots.

Let's take it as a given that all goalkeepers are good shot-stoppers just like professional tennis players are good with a racket in their hand and boxers are handy with their fists etc.

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The assumption in the telly and radio that when using the term “United” and “City” we all have to know the hallowed unspoken prefix, “Manchester”.

TalkSport, and especially Alan Brazil, are particularly guilty of this. “So it’s a big big weekend in the Premiership (sic) this weekend with City taking on United”.

Oh ok, Leicester must be playing West Ham, might be interesti..aaagh no it’s bloody Manchester again!!!

 

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