The Batman Posted February 22, 2021 Report Share Posted February 22, 2021 By sheer coincidence, yesterday was the first day back on here for me. I stopped coming on here the day that this topic started. Gave myself a break from a few things, one of them being this forum. Thankfully I have very supportive friends and family and my company are shit hot on mental health and well being policies, they've been extremely good. Just want to get back to my office, even if it is just for 2 days a week to begin with. On a side note, because of my epilepsy and my ptsd, I've had my first covid vaccine which surprised me but they said I was entitled so I took it. 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacker Posted February 22, 2021 Report Share Posted February 22, 2021 Hope tonights announcement has given you a bit of a lift mate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Batman Posted February 22, 2021 Report Share Posted February 22, 2021 1 minute ago, Slacker said: Hope tonights announcement has given you a bit of a lift mate. Not half. Should have come back to otib sooner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacker Posted February 22, 2021 Report Share Posted February 22, 2021 You really shouldn't have!It has been absolutely dreadful on here prior to the excitement of Nigel arriving. I reckon you were well off out of it.Welcome back though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted February 23, 2021 Report Share Posted February 23, 2021 17 hours ago, The Batman said: By sheer coincidence, yesterday was the first day back on here for me. I stopped coming on here the day that this topic started. Gave myself a break from a few things, one of them being this forum. Thankfully I have very supportive friends and family and my company are shit hot on mental health and well being policies, they've been extremely good. Just want to get back to my office, even if it is just for 2 days a week to begin with. On a side note, because of my epilepsy and my ptsd, I've had my first covid vaccine which surprised me but they said I was entitled so I took it. Well done with the vaccine. It's good that you have a supportive circle of family & friends also. Welcome back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cidercityred Posted February 24, 2021 Report Share Posted February 24, 2021 I am a counsellor, a mans man that happens to have a passion for well-being particularly amongst men. (Not excluding women) my website is www.brighter-pathways.co.uk If you would like counselling support from a fellow Bristolian and bristol city supporter get in touch. 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 4, 2021 Report Share Posted March 4, 2021 On 17/02/2021 at 13:46, BigTone said: Got worse today. Wife had to go back to the surgeon today following her operation a few weeks back and she apparently has cancer. Now needs more surgery and radiation therapy. What a feckin year !!! Having had a cancerous bowel tumor removed just over a year ago myself I hope this has been caught soon enough, where ever it is. Didnt have radaition after but have had countless mri and CT scans, all been clear so far, no spread and worked most days since. Evil thing cancer can stirike anyone anytime, really hope it all goes well for your wife....stay strong. Lost my mum to dementia and covid earlier this year as well 96yrs sadly died alone lots of other stuff including my wife losing sight in one eye. No-one knows what anyone is going through, all we can do is keep calm and carry on. One day at a time....and hope for better things to come. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin phantom Posted March 7, 2021 Author Admin Report Share Posted March 7, 2021 EVERY 90 minutes in the UK a life is lost to suicide. It doesn't discriminate, touching the lives of people in every corner of society - from the homeless and unemployed to builders and doctors, reality stars and footballers. It's the biggest killer of people under the age of 35, more deadly than cancer and car crashes. And men are three times more likely to take their own life than women. Yet it's rarely spoken of, a taboo that threatens to continue its deadly rampage unless we all stop and take notice. If you, or anyone you know, needs help dealing with mental health problems, the following organisations provide support: CALM, www.thecalmzone.net, 0800 585 858 HeadsTogether, www.headstogether.org.uk Mind, www.mind.org.uk, 0300 123 3393 Papyrus, www.papyrus-uk.org, 0800 068 41 41 Samaritans, www.samaritans.org, 116 123 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isawjonshaw Posted March 14, 2021 Report Share Posted March 14, 2021 anyone suffer with epilepsy? asking for a freind.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Net Posted March 17, 2021 Report Share Posted March 17, 2021 I watched the Roman Kemp documentary, "Our Silent Emergency", on BBC One last night, focusing on the high number of young men who commit suicide. Heartbreaking to hear from those who had lost a dear friend or loved one. I thought that it was a brave choice of topic, as suicide is still very much a taboo subject in ordinary conversation. It's available on i-Player if anybody is interested. 2 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reddoh Posted March 18, 2021 Report Share Posted March 18, 2021 On 17/03/2021 at 18:13, In the Net said: I watched the Roman Kemp documentary, "Our Silent Emergency", on BBC One last night, focusing on the high number of young men who commit suicide. Heartbreaking to hear from those who had lost a dear friend or loved one. I thought that it was a brave choice of topic, as suicide is still very much a taboo subject in ordinary conversation. It's available on i-Player if anybody is interested. all the best and and good wishes to you and all your fans. MHI is a fascinating problem. suicide means the person feels there is no where else to go when I was a little lad I had a paper round and could do it in 18 minutes most days took 3 to 4 hours, I drank enough tea to sink a battleship and chatted to loads of old people and had great tips at Christmas. Does that make me a good or bad person? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Batman Posted April 5, 2021 Report Share Posted April 5, 2021 Good morning all. Why am I on a football forum at just after 5am? Well I've not been able to sleep. Yesterday i found out by accident that my (ex) wife has actually been in a relationship with her colleague since we separated. Despite me saying how much I wanted to work at things. She was certain that she wanted to be in her own, be independent and had no interest in anyone. Well that was a load of BS. The entire time she was lying to me. On top of my existing ptsd. It's just knocked me royally. I spent all our years together sacrificing and doing everything she ever dreamed of. And yet here we are. My mother in law said that she thought I knew ages ago because its been going on for a while. Yet her sister didn't even know. I'm not one of those guys that can just turn feelings off for someone at the flick of a switch. Probably just need some reassurance that I'm better off long out of there. But here's a spanner in the works. Back in January, I noticed a large bruise on her leg and she said that mummy's friend hit her (same guy). I raised it with mummy and she just brushed it off that they were playing with a few of her other coworkers who went round for dinner. If my daughter wasn't in the frame it would be a damn site easier, but how do I manage my concerns without just coming across as a jealous ex? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nogbad the Bad Posted April 5, 2021 Report Share Posted April 5, 2021 5 hours ago, The Batman said: Back in January, I noticed a large bruise on her leg and she said that mummy's friend hit her (same guy). I raised it with mummy and she just brushed it off that they were playing with a few of her other coworkers who went round for dinner. If my daughter wasn't in the frame it would be a damn site easier, but how do I manage my concerns without just coming across as a jealous ex? You seem to be on reasonable speaking terms with your mother in law. If I were you I'd tell her exactly what your daughter said (if you haven't already) and that you are worried that if it was the case she'd been hit, it may be repeated. Ask her if she's seen anything of concern and to keep a particularly close eye on her granddaughter, and the household, to do all she can to ensure it is a safe environment for her. The well-being of her granddaughter should be a far higher priority for her than her daughter's relationship. Good luck whatever you decide; I hope things will improve for you soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Batman Posted April 5, 2021 Report Share Posted April 5, 2021 1 hour ago, Nogbad the Bad said: You seem to be on reasonable speaking terms with your mother in law. If I were you I'd tell her exactly what your daughter said (if you haven't already) and that you are worried that if it was the case she'd been hit, it may be repeated. Ask her if she's seen anything of concern and to keep a particularly close eye on her granddaughter, and the household, to do all she can to ensure it is a safe environment for her. The well-being of her granddaughter should be a far higher priority for her than her daughter's relationship. Good luck whatever you decide; I hope things will improve for you soon. I did. She brushed it off too saying they were just playing dinosaurs, which mirrors what mummy said. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Net Posted April 5, 2021 Report Share Posted April 5, 2021 16 hours ago, The Batman said: Good morning all. Why am I on a football forum at just after 5am? Well I've not been able to sleep. Yesterday i found out by accident that my (ex) wife has actually been in a relationship with her colleague since we separated. Despite me saying how much I wanted to work at things. She was certain that she wanted to be in her own, be independent and had no interest in anyone. Well that was a load of BS. The entire time she was lying to me. On top of my existing ptsd. It's just knocked me royally. I spent all our years together sacrificing and doing everything she ever dreamed of. And yet here we are. My mother in law said that she thought I knew ages ago because its been going on for a while. Yet her sister didn't even know. I'm not one of those guys that can just turn feelings off for someone at the flick of a switch. Probably just need some reassurance that I'm better off long out of there. But here's a spanner in the works. Back in January, I noticed a large bruise on her leg and she said that mummy's friend hit her (same guy). I raised it with mummy and she just brushed it off that they were playing with a few of her other coworkers who went round for dinner. If my daughter wasn't in the frame it would be a damn site easier, but how do I manage my concerns without just coming across as a jealous ex? That's a horrible situation. Unfortunately, by the time someone decides to leave a relationship, they've already checked out emotionally - often because they've got somebody else lined up, but very rarely admit it. (I've got the t-shirt). Very tough for the one left behind, you've had all this come as a shock, plus the worry about your daughter. Do you think your wife would lie about how the bruise came about? I don't know your daughter's age, or if she could be coerced into covering up how it happened. It's early days, you must allow yourself to grieve for the relationship - you'll go through similar emotions as people do when adjusting to the passing of a loved one. I didn't really go through the "anger" phase, which made it hard to let go. Good advice from Nogbad re. talking to the mother-in-law, maybe sound out what she thinks. Please don't let you mental health deteriorate, contact your GP if necessary. You may well have already done talking therapies for the PTSD - it's something which I've found helpful in the past. Good luck - each day is a tiny step forward to a new beginning. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Batman Posted April 7, 2021 Report Share Posted April 7, 2021 Well after discussing things with my friends (one of whom is a solicitor) , I've just decided to start the ball rolling regarding petitioning the court for a divorce under the grounds of adultery. Even though we separated at the end of July, you can still divorce on adultery grounds if your partner gets involved with someone so soon after. She has no grounds to divorce me because she's always maintained that I am a perfect husband and father, but she just doesn't love me in that way anymore. Nothing valid there in the eyes of the law. Just gonna put the last 9 heartbreaking, gut wrenching months behind me ASAP. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin phantom Posted April 7, 2021 Author Admin Report Share Posted April 7, 2021 EVERY 90 minutes in the UK a life is lost to suicide. It doesn't discriminate, touching the lives of people in every corner of society - from the homeless and unemployed to builders and doctors, reality stars and footballers. It's the biggest killer of people under the age of 35, more deadly than cancer and car crashes. And men are three times more likely to take their own life than women. Yet it's rarely spoken of, a taboo that threatens to continue its deadly rampage unless we all stop and take notice, now. If you, or anyone you know, needs help dealing with mental health problems, the following organisations provide support: CALM, www.thecalmzone.net 0800 585 858 ‐------------------------ Heads Together www.headstogether.org.uk -------------------------- Mind www.mind.org.uk 0300 123 3393 -------------------------- Papyrus www.papyrus-uk.org 0800 068 41 41 --------------------------- Samaritans www.samaritans.org 116 123 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheCulturalBomb Posted April 20, 2021 Report Share Posted April 20, 2021 I wanted to make some sort of post on here, as today I lost my father. Without him, I wouldn't be a robin. The excitement you got when he got you the newest top ready for the new season. Shielding me on those cold and rainy days at the gate. Celebrating and cheering on the way home on the radio at the results of the other teams. Simply chatting about and watching football on the telly. And all the other things in between. Thank you, and I'll love you always. 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted April 21, 2021 Report Share Posted April 21, 2021 Wife had her op yesterday. Surgeon says she is a lucky girl so hopefully managed to get all the cancer. Get final biopsy results tomorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacker Posted April 21, 2021 Report Share Posted April 21, 2021 1 hour ago, BigTone said: Wife had her op yesterday. Surgeon says she is a lucky girl so hopefully managed to get all the cancer. Get final biopsy results tomorrow. Fingers crossed for Mrs Tone.Hope tomorrow comes up trumps for you both? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted April 21, 2021 Report Share Posted April 21, 2021 2 minutes ago, Slacker said: Fingers crossed for Mrs Tone.Hope tomorrow comes up trumps for you both? Cheers mate, its looking good TBH so fingers crossed. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacker Posted April 21, 2021 Report Share Posted April 21, 2021 1 minute ago, BigTone said: Cheers mate, its looking good TBH so fingers crossed. Hopefully a joint All Clear and Gas relegation party for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted April 21, 2021 Report Share Posted April 21, 2021 Just now, Slacker said: Hopefully a joint All Clear and Gas relegation party for you. Now that would be nice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Net Posted April 22, 2021 Report Share Posted April 22, 2021 On 20/04/2021 at 23:21, TheCulturalBomb said: I wanted to make some sort of post on here, as today I lost my father. Without him, I wouldn't be a robin. The excitement you got when he got you the newest top ready for the new season. Shielding me on those cold and rainy days at the gate. Celebrating and cheering on the way home on the radio at the results of the other teams. Simply chatting about and watching football on the telly. And all the other things in between. Thank you, and I'll love you always. Sincere condolences on your loss. My late Father introduced me to football, and it creates a very special bond, sharing the excitement, disappointment, ups and downs. Glad that you have so many happy memories to look back on and treasure in the future. 16 hours ago, BigTone said: Wife had her op yesterday. Surgeon says she is a lucky girl so hopefully managed to get all the cancer. Get final biopsy results tomorrow. Holding positive thoughts for Mrs BT. x 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted April 22, 2021 Report Share Posted April 22, 2021 Had the "all clear" 18mths ago now, still have had to have; 4monthly MRI scans, rectal ultra sound scans, blood tests and the dredded endoscopy. The consultant wanted to either; cut half me bowels out "just to be sure" after my op or do the 4mth observations ....chose the observations. Still all good atm next obs coming up in a few weeks, hoping to move to 6mths obs if all ok still. Hopefully dodged the bullet and can "semi-retire" ....again soon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Batman Posted April 25, 2021 Report Share Posted April 25, 2021 On 07/04/2021 at 15:05, The Batman said: Well after discussing things with my friends (one of whom is a solicitor) , I've just decided to start the ball rolling regarding petitioning the court for a divorce under the grounds of adultery. Even though we separated at the end of July, you can still divorce on adultery grounds if your partner gets involved with someone so soon after. She has no grounds to divorce me because she's always maintained that I am a perfect husband and father, but she just doesn't love me in that way anymore. Nothing valid there in the eyes of the law. Just gonna put the last 9 heartbreaking, gut wrenching months behind me ASAP. Update. Yesterday was an all round good day. Rovers relegated and then Swindon relegated. Between their games, I received an email from the courts advising that my divorce petition has been accepted so the ball has started rolling now. Had a Thatchers Gold last night to celebrate. First cider I've had in a very long time. Tried to stay off the alcohol but felt it was worth it last night. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin phantom Posted May 11, 2021 Author Admin Report Share Posted May 11, 2021 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin phantom Posted May 12, 2021 Author Admin Report Share Posted May 12, 2021 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KevP Posted May 14, 2021 Report Share Posted May 14, 2021 On 12/05/2021 at 23:18, phantom said: Saw your post last night which you've since taken down. Hope you're feeling better now after your date and hope your mate is ok. Were all in this together pal and look out for each other....Things always seem worse in the dark of night I find.....The daylight brings a little more hope usually. .COYR. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post BigTone Posted May 20, 2021 Popular Post Report Share Posted May 20, 2021 (edited) Some good news to report for once. Wife (aka BigBitch) saw Specialist yesterday and they managed to remove all of the cancer. No further treatment required. Happy days Edited May 20, 2021 by BigTone 20 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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