handsofclay Posted August 22, 2016 Report Share Posted August 22, 2016 I don't do Twitter etc and I don't really know if this should have gone in the transfer rumours section because the player concerned is without a club at present and is really flying below the radar. So anyway, here goes: Leicester City won the title last season by winning matches in which they had far less possession than their opponents and Burnley beat Liverpool on Saturday, emphatically, with only 19% possession of the ball. If I recall correctly, Iceland had far less possession than England when they beat us without any due alarm. It therefore occurs to me that the modern trend to bring success to a club is to have as little possession of the ball as possible. The problem is, when this becomes well known neither team will want possession of the ball for fear that if they have it too much they will lose. Now this is where I come in. I firmly believe, and I make no apologies for making this boast, that if Bristol City put me in a central midfield slot, I could do an effective job of continually losing possession. I would make myself available to my teammates as an outlet ball and they would have confidence knowing that I would then lose possession of it. I wouldn't do this on the cheap. I will have to run the gauntlet of abuse from my fellow City fans who will call me Feet of Clay or simply FOC, or Focer...with a hard C, so I would want 10 grand a week. But, despite all the abuse I will be recompensed not only financially but also in the knowledge that fans will also acknowledge that although I would it seemed be the worst player to ever have donned the red shirt, that whenever I played City won and therefore my efforts were greatly undervalued. It would be noted that I was doing an unglamorous but necessarily job in the interests of the team and that I was one of the best exponents of losing possession of the ball in the world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WestfieldRed Posted August 22, 2016 Report Share Posted August 22, 2016 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drew Peacock Posted August 22, 2016 Report Share Posted August 22, 2016 8 minutes ago, handsofclay1909 said: I don't do Twitter etc and I don't really know if this should have gone in the transfer rumours section because the player concerned is without a club at present and is really flying below the radar. So anyway, here goes: Leicester City won the title last season by winning matches in which they had far less possession than their opponents and Burnley beat Liverpool on Saturday, emphatically, with only 19% possession of the ball. If I recall correctly, Iceland had far less possession than England when they beat us without any due alarm. It therefore occurs to me that the modern trend to bring success to a club is to have as little possession of the ball as possible. The problem is, when this becomes well known neither team will want possession of the ball for fear that if they have it too much they will lose. Now this is where I come in. I firmly believe, and I make no apologies for making this boast, that if Bristol City put me in a central midfield slot, I could do an effective job of continually losing possession. I would make myself available to my teammates as an outlet ball and they would have confidence knowing that I would then lose possession of it. I wouldn't do this on the cheap. I will have to run the gauntlet of abuse from my fellow City fans who will call me Feet of Clay or simply FOC, or Focer...with a hard C, so I would want 10 grand a week. But, despite all the abuse I will be recompensed not only financially but also in the knowledge that fans will also acknowledge that although I would it seemed be the worst player to ever have donned the red shirt, that whenever I played City won and therefore my efforts were greatly undervalued. It would be noted that I was doing an unglamorous but necessarily job in the interests of the team and that I was one of the best exponents of losing possession of the ball in the world. We already have Freeman to do this job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
... Posted August 22, 2016 Report Share Posted August 22, 2016 1 hour ago, handsofclay1909 said: I don't do Twitter etc and I don't really know if this should have gone in the transfer rumours section because the player concerned is without a club at present and is really flying below the radar. So anyway, here goes: Leicester City won the title last season by winning matches in which they had far less possession than their opponents and Burnley beat Liverpool on Saturday, emphatically, with only 19% possession of the ball. If I recall correctly, Iceland had far less possession than England when they beat us without any due alarm. It therefore occurs to me that the modern trend to bring success to a club is to have as little possession of the ball as possible. The problem is, when this becomes well known neither team will want possession of the ball for fear that if they have it too much they will lose. Now this is where I come in. I firmly believe, and I make no apologies for making this boast, that if Bristol City put me in a central midfield slot, I could do an effective job of continually losing possession. I would make myself available to my teammates as an outlet ball and they would have confidence knowing that I would then lose possession of it. I wouldn't do this on the cheap. I will have to run the gauntlet of abuse from my fellow City fans who will call me Feet of Clay or simply FOC, or Focer...with a hard C, so I would want 10 grand a week. But, despite all the abuse I will be recompensed not only financially but also in the knowledge that fans will also acknowledge that although I would it seemed be the worst player to ever have donned the red shirt, that whenever I played City won and therefore my efforts were greatly undervalued. It would be noted that I was doing an unglamorous but necessarily job in the interests of the team and that I was one of the best exponents of losing possession of the ball in the world. Are you being voluntarily sectioned, or do you want us to do the paperwork? Uncle TFR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rudolf Hucker Posted August 22, 2016 Report Share Posted August 22, 2016 1 hour ago, handsofclay1909 said: I don't do Twitter etc and I don't really know if this should have gone in the transfer rumours section because the player concerned is without a club at present and is really flying below the radar. So anyway, here goes: Leicester City won the title last season by winning matches in which they had far less possession than their opponents and Burnley beat Liverpool on Saturday, emphatically, with only 19% possession of the ball. If I recall correctly, Iceland had far less possession than England when they beat us without any due alarm. It therefore occurs to me that the modern trend to bring success to a club is to have as little possession of the ball as possible. The problem is, when this becomes well known neither team will want possession of the ball for fear that if they have it too much they will lose. Now this is where I come in. I firmly believe, and I make no apologies for making this boast, that if Bristol City put me in a central midfield slot, I could do an effective job of continually losing possession. I would make myself available to my teammates as an outlet ball and they would have confidence knowing that I would then lose possession of it. I wouldn't do this on the cheap. I will have to run the gauntlet of abuse from my fellow City fans who will call me Feet of Clay or simply FOC, or Focer...with a hard C, so I would want 10 grand a week. But, despite all the abuse I will be recompensed not only financially but also in the knowledge that fans will also acknowledge that although I would it seemed be the worst player to ever have donned the red shirt, that whenever I played City won and therefore my efforts were greatly undervalued. It would be noted that I was doing an unglamorous but necessarily job in the interests of the team and that I was one of the best exponents of losing possession of the ball in the world. You still wouldn't be as bad as Nicky Hunt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
downendcity Posted August 22, 2016 Report Share Posted August 22, 2016 45 minutes ago, Taxi for Rennie said: Are you being voluntarily sectioned, or do you want us to do the paperwork? Uncle TFR I think in exceptional cases the application can be fast tracked online through yougov.uk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick Wilde Posted August 22, 2016 Report Share Posted August 22, 2016 Have you approached Darrell Clarke, Or are you over qualified? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
handsofclay Posted August 22, 2016 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2016 2 hours ago, Taxi for Rennie said: Are you being voluntarily sectioned, or do you want us to do the paperwork? Uncle TFR Thank you for your kind offer but I will have to decline as I have been in touch with the governor of the sanitorium and he says that they will only accept paperwork from accredited medical practitioners and not from the inmates. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
handsofclay Posted August 22, 2016 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2016 1 hour ago, Rudolf Hucker said: You still wouldn't be as bad as Nicky Hunt. You could have let me down lightly, mate. How can I ever get close to even matching that. My dreams are shattered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renaissance Williams Posted August 22, 2016 Report Share Posted August 22, 2016 13 hours ago, Taxi for Rennie said: Are you being voluntarily sectioned, or do you want us to do the paperwork? Uncle TFR If they start sectioning people for what they post on OTIB the NHS will grind to a halt! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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