Goldberg Posted February 7, 2006 Report Share Posted February 7, 2006 Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt."Now you can intellectually handle the situation.Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt.Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, a partner of Kneedeep &. Schitt Inc.In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced 6 children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins: Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school drop out. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.Noe Schitt later married Mr. Sherlock, and because her kids were living With them she wanted to keep her previous name. She was known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a nervous son, Chicken Schitt.Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding.The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new bride, Piza Schitt. So now if someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt", you can correct them. Not only do you know Jack, you know his whole family! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest revkev Posted February 7, 2006 Report Share Posted February 7, 2006 A standing ovation for this superb joke, have just sprayed coffee all over my study wall Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dinky Gems Posted February 7, 2006 Report Share Posted February 7, 2006 Loved it, fantasic!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goldberg Posted February 7, 2006 Author Report Share Posted February 7, 2006 What about this oneA blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and helpme. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get itstarted."Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?" Theblonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets himin and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. Hestudiesthe pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her andsays,"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able toassemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger."He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have anicecup of tea, and then ..." He sighed................ "Let's put all theFrosties back in the box......."................................................................................................................................................................................................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
city fan 2 Posted February 9, 2006 Report Share Posted February 9, 2006 http://home.pacbell.net/diana_do/knowjack.htm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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