Technical Help Needed

[Northern Red]

don't know if this has been done before but it made me smile

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18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates 4.2,

which I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are apparently

conflicts between these two products and the only solution was to try

and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off.

To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several

other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and Playboy 6.9.

Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better. I tried a shareware

program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left a virus in my

system, forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks.

Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the

same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected each other

they caused severe damage to my hardware.

I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this

product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0 tends to

use up all my available resources, it does come bundled with Cleanhouse2005.

Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be

very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were automatically

stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months

later when I had forgotten about them.

Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter, and

can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Multi-Whinge. These latter

products

have no Help files, and I have to try to guess what the problem is.

Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly,

requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express which needs

to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my

Saab 93 Convertible hard drive, it often crashes.

Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw, which

can't be turned off. Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress

2003, but there could be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the

fact that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2003, it tends to delete all of your

money before uninstalling itself.

Help requested please!