Jump to content
IGNORED

Madame Guillotine


mozo

Recommended Posts

Alright my babbers? Who shall we behead??

...

For younger viewers, a guillotine is a French beheading device named after Joseph-Ignace Guillotin, the sadistic homme who thought it was more entertaining to chop people's bonces off with a sophisticated device, instead of the primitive fat-bloke-swinging-an-axe method.

...

WELL...I, the notorious Count Mozo of Bedminstershire have decided to bring back the nefarious implement (they come cheap in Ikea, I hear) and to execute those who deserve it just like the Frenchies did with the poncey poshos back in the day.

...

I will be taking nominations for future beheadings, but will only accept one per person so make 'em good!

You can't have any of the following cos they are to be ravaged alive by ravenous midgets who have been starved for two whole days (you know how they get when they're hungry!)...

Richard Branson

James Blunt (rhyming slang!)

Tony Blair

Christiano Ronaldo

Ben Elton (to be to be caged with rampantly horny badgers)

...

Muhahahahahahahaha...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Alright my babbers? Who shall we behead??

...

For younger viewers, a guillotine is a French beheading device named after Joseph-Ignace Guillotin, the sadistic homme who thought it was more entertaining to chop people's bonces off with a sophisticated device, instead of the primitive fat-bloke-swinging-an-axe method.

...

WELL...I, the notorious Count Mozo of Bedminstershire have decided to bring back the nefarious implement (they come cheap in Ikea, I hear) and to execute those who deserve it just like the Frenchies did with the poncey poshos back in the day.

...

I will be taking nominations for future beheadings, but will only accept one per person so make 'em good!

You can't have any of the following cos they are to be ravaged alive by ravenous midgets who have been starved for two whole days (you know how they get when they're hungry!)...

Richard Branson

James Blunt (rhyming slang!)

Tony Blair

Christiano Ronaldo

Ben Elton (to be to be caged with rampantly horny badgers)

...

Muhahahahahahahaha...

the question is will you suffer the same fate as the inventor

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Inzaman Ul Haq,

but do it before he goes into bat today. The Pakistani's are going to be miles ahead by the end of the day me thinks.

but if you cuold re-attach his head for the 20/20 match in Bristol on Bank Holiday Monday then that'll be good, it'll be an honour watching him play, just so long as he don't score any runs against us.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

WELL...I, the notorious Count Mozo of Bedminstershire

Was that a typo? Or did you mean to leave the o in there?

How about Hollowhead, the ensuing sound would be similar to a giant bouncing table-tennis ball. :dunno:

Yes sir, yes yes yes (or as a speechimpeppermint would say it yeshhshs) I'll second that notion. Spot on. The echo from his hollowhead would be like, umm, music to my ears?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I know you said only one person each but please could I nominate Richard & Judy. They only come as a pair, and if we only execute one the other may mutate into something worse than Des O'Connor.

Not being in favour of capital punishment, I would take all those listed above, shove them all in the Big Brother house and throw away the key. No camera, no publicity or celebrity, just leave 'em to it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not being in favour of capital punishment, I would take all those listed above, shove them all in the Big Brother house and throw away the key. No camera, no publicity or celebrity, just leave 'em to it.

Terrible idea Rev! Imagine the offspring! Euw! :pinch:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I know you said only one person each but please could I nominate Richard & Judy. They only come as a pair, and if we only execute one the other may mutate into something worse than Des O'Connor.

On the same basis I'd like to nominate Ant and Dec.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You're right.

In the same way that Goebels has been referred to many times since his death, maybe robbies death might show the world his true light

how the hell can you compare Robbie Williams to Goering?

IPB ImageIPB Image

oh yeah barry, seperated at birth. The mother was in labour for 83 years as well.

and he deserves his legendary statues. Robbie will be around for many years.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...