City Exile Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 My son plays the cello. He's young and truth be told is obviously not amougst the top notch players. However, he's been doing pretty well. He has been going through a continuous assessment process this year, and he harbours ambitions to play at a higher level. Equally, me and his family would love this to happen. Sometimes I wonder if we wish it to much. The competition to get to the next level is intense, and the vast majority will fail. Anyway, after a slow start this year, he was coming on great guns, and had become one of the favoriates to proceed. His playing was never perfect, but it was certainly good enough. However, over the last week or so, he seems to have been going backwards. Silly mistakes have been creeping in again. Its almost like he can see the finish line, and the realisation of his ambition, and is suffering from the pressure. He has a further assessment this Friday, and I would really welcome readers advice. I always go along to watch, and I am so keen for him to succeed. I am sure the best way to motivate him will be to watch the first few minutes, and only get stuck in if he starts making mistakes again. He needs to know I care, and I feel the best way to do this will be to start shouting at him, telling him the mistakes he is making. Equally, I am convinced his teacher is letting him down, and he may feel more comfortable if I start blaming the teacher instead during his test. This sounds right, but I appreciate others may have experiences, and I would love to hear how they would seek to motivate him to achieve the standards I know he is capable of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest RedwardsV1 Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 Yeah cool 4 him, but what has this got 2 do with BCFC? EDIT : Read again thx 2 Edson, Very good... please don't post it this early in the morning again please Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
edson Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 Yeah cool 4 him, but what has this got 2 do with BCFC? Try reading it again.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
City Exile Posted March 9, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 Um Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DolmanDudess Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 You really really shouldnt post things like this, this early on in the morning.... I fell for that aswell then Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
City Exile Posted March 9, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 I do aplologise. However Citygal, I had read your orginal response, and assumed you had replyed in similiar vien! Your advice was sound either way. Was not wishing to take any one in as such. Just see how people would respond to a different scenario - but strikingly similiar issues! For what it is worth, I do have a son, he does play the cello, he is 7, and its like a cat is being strangled. No, he is not taking any tests! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DolmanDudess Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 I do aplologise. However Citygal, I had read your orginal response, and assumed you had replyed in similiar vien! Your advice was sound either way. Was not wishing to take any one in as such. Just see how people would respond to a different scenario - but strikingly similiar issues! For what it is worth, I do have a son, he does play the cello, he is 7, and its like a cat is being strangled. No, he is not taking any tests! It was advice from one City fan to another but now reading your first post about 6 times through and actually realising what you were getting at, i wish i hadnt bothered. Its too early Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave L Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 I think your instinct to point out your son's failings is absolutely right - particularly in his bowing technique and his pizzicato . No doubt he will get a little confused, given that just a few lessons ago you were telling him how well he was doing, but the world of classical music is a tough one and he needs to be told the truth if he is to be properly motivated to do his best. Indeed, why wait until Friday? I suggest you start 'motivating' him now. Every time you see him, point out how rubbish he was at his last recital. Explain how despite having told him he was brilliant a couple of weeks back, you now think he's a steaming pile of cr*p who never stands a chance of playing the theme to Postman Pat properly, never mind Beethoven's cello concerto. Then, on Friday, make sure you have a few pints before he performs, so your motivational technique is finely honed. When he walks on stage, greet him with mute indifference. When his teacher arrives, you could even boo him. Both pupil and teacher should now be nicely relaxed, ready to give of their best. Your son is bound to be a bit nervous, but don't make any allowances for that. The second he plays a slightly off note, or is even a semi-breve late in coming in on queue, launch into a stream of invective. Tell him he's a ###t, we*sh, bl*ck, overp*id, bot*ler who's a disgrace to his cello. I think you will find that your son will then have no problem performing at the level at which you clearly feel he belongs, and I'm sure there are many other parents out there who will support your actions. Good luck to the lad in his musical career. he must be very proud to have a parent who cares so much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tompo Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Will Rollason Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 Ere!!! whats all this hapclap analogous rubbish. We're ######## and we're goin down,sack the board and sacrifice the cat. Re your sons prob.Try going to his school and see if you can find some talented youngster who could sit in for him at recital.You might have to bribe him and he may not actually be any better than your son but nevermind,your son will have learned a valuable lesson.He's not good enough and you dont have any faith in him! Happy Parenting! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chivs Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 Umm, yes, tough one. I'm not very good with the cello though I did play in a pub band a while back. From this experience I think the best advice is that you should just be relaxed with your son. Of course he's going to make mistakes. Even those French musicians from the NLO (North London Orchestra) occasionally hit the wrong note. The main question is how good are the accompanists? Your son's cello playing may be of the highest order but if the brass section comes in too early (or, more likely, doesn't come in at all) then he's stuffed. I recommend you just go with the flow and see where your son's playing takes you. It promises to be a trombone of a journey. PS If he fails the test, take the teacher outside and give him a good going over with a bongo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedM Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 I think your son should at least look like he is trying . If he looks passionate and that he cares for his cello that should at least win some credit from the examiners. If he looks down trodden and disinterested they are not going to be best pleased if they have used their valuable time to go and watch a poor performance. He may not have the skills but play from the heart with a big smile and he will go far. Bluff his way through the test, he CAN perform, just be positive. Don't worry about the other celloists, they are also nervous and will make mistakes. Maybe bigger mistakes than you son's. After Fridays test ask your son to explain to you how he did. Do not accept the old excuses like blaming the bow, slippery floorboards, poor lighting etc. Get him to be honest with you ( and you with him) about his performance. Only when he is honest with you about any shortcomings will you both be able to move forward and make changes. Then on to the next test! Great post by the way! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slartibartfast Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 As Sir Thomas Beecham once remarked to a lady cellist prone to making the odd performing error, " Madam, you've got an excellent thing between your legs, but all you do is sit there and scratch it!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave L Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 As Sir Thomas Beecham once remarked to a lady cellist prone to making the odd performing error, " Madam, you've got an excellent thing between your legs, but all you do is sit there and scratch it!" Also attributed to various other conductors, but usually about a male cellist: 'For heaven's sake man, you've got God's finest instrument there between your legs, and all you can do is sit there and scratch it!' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cheshire_red Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 Excellent reading! Brightened up my morning, oh, look at the time!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bucksred Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 Post of the Week!!! first time i've been able to access it!! OBTW, let your boy join a rock n roll band, he learn to play, travel the world, get laid, and will enjoy himself!! dont forget to have a silly ponytail though' a spark of light in the darkness..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
screech Posted March 9, 2004 Report Share Posted March 9, 2004 Sounds like to me that the teacher can't take him any further and you should seek a new one before the end of the year, shouting at him when he plays #### wont do him any good, but after several poor performance with the cello he should be rested for a few weeks so he can focus on playing well again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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