BS2 Red

Bang Bang You're Dead - Dirty Pretty Things

Fill it up with Perrier and it'd still be cheaper to run than a normal car.

Gordon Is A Moron - Jilted John

Why - Yoko Ono

My dad always says he can remember getting a City ticket, a return on the bus, a pie and a pint all for £1. Today buying all of that would require a second mortgage.

Special Brew - Bad Manners

Let's Talk About Sex - Salt-N-Pepa

Cheese and Onions - The Rutles

The "Jesus Saves, but *** scores the rebound" seems to have been used a lot. Even in ice hockey with Wayne Gretzky. But it looks like it started with Ian St John. Which makes sense with a surname like that. https://www.independent.co.uk/voices/commentators/stan-hey-loyalty-can-t-turn-back-the-clock-2180317.html?amp

Jesus and Satan were having an argument about who was better with computers. They had been going at it for days, and God was tired of hearing all of the bickering. Finally God said, "I am going to set up a test that will run for two hours and I will judge who does the better job." So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away. They did spreadsheets. They wrote reports. They sent faxes. They sent e-mail. They sent out e-mail with attachments. They downloaded. They did reports. They made cards. They did every known job. But ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, the rain poured and, of course, the electricity went off. Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld. Jesus just sighed. The electricity finally flickered back on and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming "It's gone! It's all gone! I lost everything when the power went out!" Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours. Satan observed this and became irate. "Wait! He cheated, how did he do it?" God shrugged and said, "Jesus saves."

Steal My Sunshine - Len

Don't Call Me Baby - Voice of the Beehive.

It doesn't quite work but it sounds like you are Born of Frustration.

Exposed - A Day To Remember

With a comment like that, it sounds like you need to go out and get Laid.

That's a shame. It wasn't raining when James were on, but it was bloody freezing!

We probably walked past each other! I thought James were excellent, not even the gasheads behind me (loudly shouting "up the gas") ruined my day.

The show would have had 50million viewers if they were not locked out of their Sky boxes.

Radio/Video - System of a Down

The trouble with the Greens is that, since they got bought out by King Godomar, there is no soul left in the club.

I wondered how it actually started and found this on Wikipedia. I blame the Byzantines! And 70 year old drunk women! Violence generally associated with team sporting events and their outcomes possesses a documented history, going at least as far back as the Nika Riotsduring the Byzantine Empire. The first instance of violence associated with modern team sports is unknown, but the phenomenon of football related violence can be traced back to 14th-century England. In 1314, Edward II banned football (at that time, a violent, unruly activity involving rival villages kicking a pig's bladder across the local heath) because he believed the disorder surrounding matches might lead to social unrest, or even treason.[8] According to a University of Liverpool academic paper, conflict at an 1846 match in Derby, England, required a reading of the riot act and two groups of dragoons to effectively respond to the disorderly crowd. This same paper also identified "pitch invasions" as a common occurrence during the 1880s in English football.[9] The first recorded instances of football hooliganism in the modern game allegedly occurred during the 1880s in England, a period when gangs of supporters would intimidate neighbourhoods, in addition to attacking referees, opposing supporters and players. In 1885, after Preston North End beat Aston Villa 5–0 in a friendly match, both teams were pelted with stones, attacked with sticks, punched, kicked and spat at. One Preston player was beaten so severely that he lost consciousness and press reports at the time described the fans as "howling roughs".[8] The following year, Preston fans fought Queen's Park fans in a railway station—the first alleged instance of football hooliganism outside of a match. In 1905, a number of Preston fans were triedfor hooliganism, including a "drunk and disorderly" 70-year-old woman, following their match against Blackburn Rovers.[8] Although instances of football crowd violence and disorder have been a feature of association football throughout its history[10] (e.g. Millwall's ground was reportedly closed in 1920, 1934 and 1950 after crowd disturbances), the phenomenon only started to gain the media's attention in the late 1950s due to the re-emergence of violence in Latin American football. In the 1955–56 English football season, Liverpool and Everton fans were involved in a number of incidents and, by the 1960s, an average of 25 hooligan incidents were being reported each year in England. The label "football hooliganism" first began to appear in the English media in the mid-1960s,[11] leading to increased media interest in, and reporting of, acts of disorder. It has been argued that this, in turn, created a 'moral panic' out of proportion with the scale of the actual problem.

Smooth Criminal - Alien Ant Farm

Let it be, don't let me down because I've got a feeling something in my life came together yesterday.

Apparently Paul's dead so why not get Lennon back as well.