Eddie Hitler

Fix, another fiver down the drain

This is better than the Grand National. I am clutching my SM Gauge sweepstake ticket with huge excitement. https://twitter.com/Official_BRFC

Wot I fink is, like, the gate is grate and they is jealous gasheads wot lives in hole in ground and there stadum is like a tip and full of white plastic garden chars, if you now wot I meen.

Harmless bit of fun, as long as they do their jobs well they can be prowed that they have contributed to the success of Bristol's premier football team. They will be able to regale their gashead compatriots with wondrous tales of roofs and flush toilets.

These are not proper Rovers fans; the horse punchers, bottle throwers, pitch invaders, boob cricketers, goalkeeper punchers, pub smasher-uppers. None of them. There are only two proper Rovers fans and they have the great good sense to post here amongst people without a string of ASBs on their CVs: In the Net and Miadhenny.

Get you, with your posh book-learning and reliance upon mere facts.

Yes, were you the clever bloke at the back then? I never quite got non-Euclidean gas funding models, something about hyper-leverage and a million becoming a billion in a very strong gravitational field.

I actually took Advanced Gasonometry as an option at college. I don't remember all of it but a typical question was: Away Games: 3,000 travelling gasheads arrive at Wycombe (three part question, 12 points available) a) If the away capacity is 2,500 how many fans are locked out, and how many is this reported as being in the Bristol Evening Post (2 points each, 4 points in total) b) How many police horses will be punched after the game if (i) Rovers win (ii) the game is drawn (iii) Wycombe win (1 point each, bonus point if all three answers are correct, 4 points in total) c) How many sheeds will have been in the home end if (i) Rovers win (ii) the game is drawn (iii) Wycombe win (1 point each, bonus point if all three answers are correct, 4 points in total)

Different opinions, I haven't watched them but know several people who go to most games and that's what they tell me. You get posts here where somebody comes on saying X had a shocker and it sounds like they were at a totally different game to you.

They, Portsmouth, and Accrington are the form sides who have closed what was a fairly chunky gap on what was initially Oxford and was then Plymouth. Plymouth and Oxford have both been on the slide. The autos very much look like Northampton (obvious) and two from Pompey, Accrington and the Gas.

Plymouth are hardly "breathing down their necks"; they were top at Christmas and since then have been on a serious slide. It turns out that their manager, Derek Adams, plays the exact same players in the exact same formation week in week out and the other teams now know how to counter this. That sounds very familiar, thought I.

They're going up this season; may as well get used to it.

From the Bolton forum: We're likely to be in the same league as Bristol Rovers? The same Bristol Rovers that were in the Conference last season? We are well and truly ****ed.

So goodbye, then, Nicholas Higgs. You said You had A watertight Contract; Would you like To buy My watertight Sieve?

And you'll probably go up. Hopefully at the expense of Plymouth.

The accepted rule is that if in any doubt at all whether your post deserves a new thread to be started then you should always start a new one to be on the safe side. You otherwise run the risk of hijacking the existing thread for which no-one will thank you and may actually risk your being banned from the forum.

People finding you a nice guy is a prerequisite for being a conman.

Banjo Island sounds like one of those places where if you drive through at any hour of the day or night you can play the "spot the dressing gown" game as there will always be somebody going to the shops wearing one because getting dressed is so much effort.

I will give credit to natchoftheday for his comment that made me laugh: extras from The Chuckle Brothers!

I don't think they have us in their sights; it's Manchester City they're gunning for.

£ I've just realised why they didn't buy Bolton when that club was on the market at the same time: they couldn't afford £7.5m.

Well I certainly know that if I was one of the richest men in the world with over a hundred billion then my biggest dream would be to become the owner of Bristol Rovers FC. Bill Gates, Warren Buffet and Richard Branson will be crying themselves to sleep for weeks having been beaten to this glittering golden prize.

Anybody else remember Aldershot's "rescuer", Spencer Trethewy?

I think that's wishful thinking. They'll have a good few years now IMO, then of course the wheels will inevitably fall off again. But we'll always have the memories: "I bin frew two divorces, the Thatcher years.."