RedM Posted August 21, 2015 Report Share Posted August 21, 2015 Quiet tonight, not a loon in sight ! Be careful what you wish for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted August 21, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 21, 2015 Uncle ToneI've just put a load of washing on, and to my consternation, have discovered that a sock (hereafter "sock one") which was supposed to make safe passage to the machine - and should now be on the fast track to the freshness freeway - had inadvertently separated from the assembled garments.Being very much the obsessive compulsive type, I've gotten myself into a veritable frenzy whilst considering the myriad options for corrective action.Do I:a) Separate the matching sock (hereafter "sock two") from the cleaned clothes once the load finishes, and include both socks in the next wash? Bear in mind, however this will lead to additional sub-complexities, such as additional wear and tear on sock two (as it wouldn't really need another wash, truth be told) and therefore the potential for a premature end to its useful life.Actually, thinking about it, I suppose that particular pickle could be overcome by calculating which foot I put the majority of my weight on and always putting sock two on that foot, however that just leads to another discussion on how I can correctly identify sock two each time. Anyway, I digress...b) Wait for sock number two to dry and put both socks back in the sock drawer, and say no more about it. I feel like I've already said too much though, and I'm not sure I could stop myself blurting out my great secret - shame faced - should someone comment on any disagreeable odours in my vicinity. I had rather an unpleasant trek through a peat bog just before this unfortunate incident occurred, so that compounds the issue somewhat.I'd appreciate your urgent input, I'm supposed to be performing a self prostate examination shortly and just thinking about all this kerfuffle is making my hands shake quite violeaghiaedvnujednjEDIT - It's a Hotpoint, if that makes any difference?.Simple answer really. Sock one needs to be rewashed with sock two so as any discolouration from toenail jelly is kept to a bare minimum and shared between the two items. I mean its not good to have one sock all sticky and gooey and the other not. Hotpoints are ideal for this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
... Posted August 21, 2015 Report Share Posted August 21, 2015 What is the difference between this thread and 'ask Elvis' on Steve Wright's radio show? TFR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted August 21, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 21, 2015 What is the difference between this thread and 'ask Elvis' on Steve Wright's radio show? TFR Pass, I've never listened to it. Is it a station specially for your hospital ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted August 21, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 21, 2015 Be careful what you wish for. Its started already. One of the long term loons must have an evening pass and wants to talk to Elvis on the radio. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted August 21, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 21, 2015 I'll take this one, Tone - if that's ok? Knock one out, Super. Standard male reaction, get that dirty water off your chest Best way to ensure you don't splatter your batter on the vinegar stroke. Top marks Woodsy, I look forward to your graduation Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
... Posted August 22, 2015 Report Share Posted August 22, 2015 Pass, I've never listened to it. Is it a station specially for your hospital ? No, BigTone, we are not allowed radio in the cancer ward. TFR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted August 22, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2015 No, BigTone, we are not allowed radio in the cancer ward. TFROf course not Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
... Posted August 22, 2015 Report Share Posted August 22, 2015 Of course not You know a lot about radio interference with medical equipment, do you Tone? TFR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted August 22, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2015 And if all else fails use the ignore facility Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted August 22, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 22, 2015 look at that then. A great win today and all of a sudden no one has a problem to discuss so long may it continue Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted August 26, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 26, 2015 The newly graduated Dr Woodsy will now take over the Surgery ............... good luck to one and all Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
'Orns Posted August 26, 2015 Report Share Posted August 26, 2015 *puts on white jacket and rubs hands to warm them up..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted August 26, 2015 Author Report Share Posted August 26, 2015 *puts on white jacket and rubs hands to warm them up..... and Bash the Bishop ? Good luck Son, you deserve it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dollymarie Posted August 27, 2015 Report Share Posted August 27, 2015 How on earth can I stop lying awake at night thinking of all the things I've got to do before I move house next week, and who should I kill first if I don't move house next week? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacker Posted August 27, 2015 Report Share Posted August 27, 2015 How on earth can I stop lying awake at night thinking of all the things I've got to do before I move house next week, and who should I kill first if I don't move house next week?In my experience,Marie,as long as you kill everyone you need to,it doesn't really matter which order you dispatch them in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
'Orns Posted August 27, 2015 Report Share Posted August 27, 2015 I'm not sure whether to congratulate Slacker, or report him I once threatened, in a last minute fit of pique, to go into the estate agents with a gun if I didn't get the house keys within 15 minutes....it worked. Maybe go for that option before the killing spree, Dols I'd hate to imagine Tone sat there in tears watching you bombing down the M32 chased by Bristol's finest live on Sky. There's only ever one outcome, and it ain't pretty Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Septic Peg Posted August 27, 2015 Report Share Posted August 27, 2015 Dear Unk Tone/Dr Woodsy. She's always been the golden one has our Meg. Mum and Dad love her because she was on the Lottery and has Dale Winton's mobile number. (They love re-runs of Supermarket Sweep). So am I still entitled to be really frigging angry my sister has a monthly column in The Sun and a back page spread in some stupid tabloid supplement every weekend? Is this just sibling rivalry or should I beat her with my crystal balls? Regards, Septic Peg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
'Orns Posted August 28, 2015 Report Share Posted August 28, 2015 Ah, old Mystic still going, is she? Thought she'd died 15 years ago.... Being in The S*n is nothing to be proud of, and being female I suspect having Winton's phone number is of no use whatsoever - I wouldn't be jealous. You look like an attractive young thing, I'd keep your balls in, stick that chest out and go prove Mum & Dad wrong. You can be whatever you want to be, you go girl Big up ya self Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigTone Posted September 6, 2015 Author Report Share Posted September 6, 2015 I am sorry about the Doctor being away but Woodsy is shagging the arse off his new wife as I write but will resume normal service soon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacker Posted September 7, 2015 Report Share Posted September 7, 2015 Dear Auntie Tone.I really fancy a packet of prawn cocktail crisps.The only money I have on me is my "emergency" twenty pound note,which I keep with me for Bear Grylls type situations.When. I texted head office,Mrs Slacker said go to the vending machine.However,she is a girl and not to be trusted!Does my desire for my crisps constitute an official emergency situation?Do the same rules apply to those flapjacks with a bit of chocolate on top? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
'Orns Posted September 8, 2015 Report Share Posted September 8, 2015 You're talking to a crisp lover here Slacker - this is exactly the time an emergency £20 is neededBreak it open my boy - have those tender artificially flavoured strips of potato in your life. Nowt to do with Mrs Slacker, if a man needs crisps, a man must have crisps. Just not Smokey Bacon flavour, that is wrong. Marmite, PC, S&V, C&O are perfectly acceptable though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacker Posted September 8, 2015 Report Share Posted September 8, 2015 Muchly appreciated Woodsy and belated congratulations to you and MrsW.Thank you for taking time out from your nuptials to counsel me at this crossroads in my life.I notice that your previous incumbent couldn't be arsed!His attitude seems to have gone a bit NHS lately.I assume he is too busy on the golf course to be concerned about peoples real life problems! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Septic Peg Posted September 8, 2015 Report Share Posted September 8, 2015 You're talking to a crisp lover here Slacker - this is exactly the time an emergency £20 is neededBreak it open my boy - have those tender artificially flavoured strips of potato in your life. Nowt to do with Mrs Slacker, if a man needs crisps, a man must have crisps. Just not Smokey Bacon flavour, that is wrong. Marmite, PC, S&V, C&O are perfectly acceptable thoughYou forgot good old Ready Salted. The standby, the original, the King.Or Smiths Salt and Shake. They are a delight to behold... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedM Posted September 8, 2015 Report Share Posted September 8, 2015 Dear Auntie Tone.I really fancy a packet of prawn cocktail crisps.The only money I have on me is my "emergency" twenty pound note,which I keep with me for Bear Grylls type situations.When. I texted head office,Mrs Slacker said go to the vending machine.However,she is a girl and not to be trusted!Does my desire for my crisps constitute an official emergency situation?Do the same rules apply to those flapjacks with a bit of chocolate on top?I think we should have a crisp amnesty. Prawn Cocktail always seem the ones that get left in my household. Ready Salted are the first to go usually. I've recently re found marmite and also cheese and chive which are gorgeous. I don't often eat crisps but I have stashed them away from my family. My least fav, chicken. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aizoon Posted September 8, 2015 Report Share Posted September 8, 2015 What happened to hedgehog crisps? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slacker Posted September 8, 2015 Report Share Posted September 8, 2015 What happehio hedgehog crisps? They are hibernating! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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