Silvio Dante Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 You may have seen the ITV news this evening on this: https://www.itv.com/news/westcountry/2022-10-28/abuse-violence-and-disrespect-sees-u16-football-league-suspended The AYL has been suspended at U16 level this weekend after several incidents - including assault by a parent. As a coach of youth football, I wholeheartedly agree that bad behaviour on the sidelines and the pitch need to be stamped out. However… - This punishes all clubs, not just the guilty ones - The matches are being rescheduled so there is no “loss” of games. Indeed, as it’s half term, this may even benefit the relevant clubs. I can’t for the life of me understand why they didn’t just penalise the clubs in question. Understand it sends a message but sending a message of your club losing points is so much more effective. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedHienz Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 Sad for the kids. Can't understand any parent doing that Infront of their children. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McNasty Filth Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 1 minute ago, RedHienz said: Sad for the kids. Can't understand any parent doing that Infront of their children. The kid probably joined in! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miah Dennehy Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 I haven't been involved in kids football for over a decade, the Respect campaign started while I was and frankly it means and achieves nothing. Parent and volunteers have to self police. They have to stop allowing bullying tactics of refs by parents and coaches. Shouting at a 14 year old ref-even if they have made a bad mistake- is not acceptable. If the ref ***** up, then suck it up, its kids football FFS and everyone is learning. As it stands, the only solution I can think of, and it would be hugely unpopular, would be to put an end to the leagues and make every game, in effect, a friendly. That would also stop the ridiculous practice of the stronger teams signing up the better players. Kids in Portishead shouldn't be playing for teams in Hanham IMO. 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
And Its Smith Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 On this occasion I actually agree with a ban for all. A short sharp shock is needed to highlight the behaviour on show at most games. These people need mirrors holding up and shaming. It’s the only way it might stop. This action first and then specific bans for individuals afterwards. My son is under 12s and it’s already horrendous every week. To the point where I volunteered to run the line every week as someone has to do it and I now hugely regret it. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
And Its Smith Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 1 minute ago, Miah Dennehy said: I haven't been involved in kids football for over a decade, the Respect campaign started while I was and frankly it means and achieves nothing. Parent and volunteers have to self police. They have to stop allowing bullying tactics of refs by parents and coaches. Shouting at a 14 year old ref-even if they have made a bad mistake- is not acceptable. If the ref ***** up, then suck it up, its kids football FFS and everyone is learning. As it stands, the only solution I can think of, and it would be hugely unpopular, would be to put an end to the leagues and make every game, in effect, a friendly. That would also stop the ridiculous practice of the stronger teams signing up the better players. Kids in Portishead shouldn't be playing for teams in Hanham IMO. I was chatting to a coach of a longwell green age group recently. He was literally talking as if he was a premier league manager talking about all of his recent signings. It’s embarrassing behaviour. 3 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redar me Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 Behaviour at youth football has been awful for years , not everyone but certainly enough. It’s a brave and timely decision whether it has any effect is unfortunately unlikely . The big issue is deluded parents reliving their football careers through their child and having completely unrealistic expectations of them making it. If your still playing u16 Avon youth league your chances of making it are virtually nil . With the hoovering up of anyone with any talent that the professional clubs do players in general are well out of these leagues before u16. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gazred Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 My brother was a coach and manager for a Wiltshire youth club until a few years back. 8 years of dealing with overly competitive coaches, managers and parents finally did it for him. It should be a massively positive environment on a match day, everyone's there for the kids surely? Sadly this sort of behaviour has been going on for years. Really disappointed every time I see it. Sad news. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silvio Dante Posted October 28, 2022 Author Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 33 minutes ago, Miah Dennehy said: I haven't been involved in kids football for over a decade, the Respect campaign started while I was and frankly it means and achieves nothing. Parent and volunteers have to self police. They have to stop allowing bullying tactics of refs by parents and coaches. Shouting at a 14 year old ref-even if they have made a bad mistake- is not acceptable. If the ref ***** up, then suck it up, its kids football FFS and everyone is learning. As it stands, the only solution I can think of, and it would be hugely unpopular, would be to put an end to the leagues and make every game, in effect, a friendly. That would also stop the ridiculous practice of the stronger teams signing up the better players. Kids in Portishead shouldn't be playing for teams in Hanham IMO. I think I agree in part and disagree in part. In the HML it’s non competitive but there is still natural competition and that wouldn’t change if it was formal league or friendly. I don’t really therefore agree with that. Where I think you are right is that it isn’t right (unless they’ve moved) for kids from Portishead playing for Hanham or similar. That’s a total joke. It should be about playing with your mates (or other local kids) and forming the bonds and learning how to work together and rely on each other. It means more that way - but I have (even at U8 when I coached at that age) seen coaches give bollockings at HT which can’t be right. I realise I’m totally lucky in that I have a really good group of parents who understand that it’s as much about having fun as it is winning the game. It only works if coaches and parents are on the same page. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BCFC11 Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 54 minutes ago, And Its Smith said: I was chatting to a coach of a longwell green age group recently. He was literally talking as if he was a premier league manager talking about all of his recent signings. It’s embarrassing behaviour. Wasn’t U10’s by any chance? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
And Its Smith Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 12 minutes ago, BCFC11 said: Wasn’t U10’s by any chance? No a bit older than that but sounds like more than one age group! Longwell green are VERY serious. Winning first, fun second. My coaching sport is cricket and thankfully you don’t see much of it there. I saw one bad thing last season and either watched or coached about 35 games. The adult leagues are bad though, much worse than when I played 15-20 years ago Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SBB Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 Local U16 football has always been pretty bad in terms of player discipline. Year 11 students with puberty and testosterone in full swing, all in a young man’s body with a 16 year olds brain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miah Dennehy Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 41 minutes ago, Silvio Dante said: I think I agree in part and disagree in part. In the HML it’s non competitive but there is still natural competition and that wouldn’t change if it was formal league or friendly. I don’t really therefore agree with that. Where I think you are right is that it isn’t right (unless they’ve moved) for kids from Portishead playing for Hanham or similar. That’s a total joke. It should be about playing with your mates (or other local kids) and forming the bonds and learning how to work together and rely on each other. It means more that way - but I have (even at U8 when I coached at that age) seen coaches give bollockings at HT which can’t be right. I realise I’m totally lucky in that I have a really good group of parents who understand that it’s as much about having fun as it is winning the game. It only works if coaches and parents are on the same page. I didn't realise HML was non competitive , it wasn't when I was involved. I just think taking away the league structure would-hopefully- take away the focus from winning games and make it more about learning how to play the game and enjoying it. I have lost count of the amount of times I have heard youth coaches talk about 'must win' games . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 Punish the offenders. Don’t ruin it for everyone else. If a club has an issue with a parent, then they should tell that parent they can’t attend the game. Drop your kid off and wait in the car park until you can behave yourself. Let everyone else get on with enjoying football. Let the ********* sit in a corner. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
petehinton Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 (edited) Some of the stuff I see whilst scouting, really not surprised. At any age group, either woodspring/Avon/JPL leagues, still parents living through their kids who think they can make it or coaches who act like they’re Pep. It’s beyond cringe Edited October 28, 2022 by petehinton 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pongo88 Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 I think this is a good idea. Yes, all matches will be rescheduled but it acts as a warning. When there is a situation like this it’s best to start with a relatively low level protest. If this doesn’t work then the league can go to the next level. The alternative is to do nothing or to go OTT and overreact. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joe jordans teeth Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 1 hour ago, Harry said: Punish the offenders. Don’t ruin it for everyone else. If a club has an issue with a parent, then they should tell that parent they can’t attend the game. Drop your kid off and wait in the car park until you can behave yourself. Let everyone else get on with enjoying football. Let the ********* sit in a corner. Is the correct answer,of course the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree in most cases and if the kid plays up when his parent isn’t there then ban him as well 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SBB Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 1 hour ago, Harry said: Punish the offenders. Don’t ruin it for everyone else. If a club has an issue with a parent, then they should tell that parent they can’t attend the game. Drop your kid off and wait in the car park until you can behave yourself. Let everyone else get on with enjoying football. Let the ********* sit in a corner. I/we did exactly that, twice. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Posted October 28, 2022 Report Share Posted October 28, 2022 34 minutes ago, joe jordans teeth said: Is the correct answer,of course the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree in most cases and if the kid plays up when his parent isn’t there then ban him as well Exactly. 14 minutes ago, SBB said: I/we did exactly that, twice. Excellent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sglosbcfc Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 12 hours ago, And Its Smith said: No a bit older than that but sounds like more than one age group! Longwell green are VERY serious. Winning first, fun second. My coaching sport is cricket and thankfully you don’t see much of it there. I saw one bad thing last season and either watched or coached about 35 games. The adult leagues are bad though, much worse than when I played 15-20 years ago Just to give balance, I'm involved at Longwell Green and in both my son's and daughter's leagues 90% of games this season have been played in a great spirit. Similarly with the JPL, no issues at all. I think strong refs who know their powers are important. The young refs starting out should only ref the under 12s down in my opinion. When I ref games I have no issues because I won't accept I'll discipline. The ref has ultimate authority and can even abandon a game if he/she feels fit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frenchred Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 12 minutes ago, sglosbcfc said: Just to give balance, I'm involved at Longwell Green and in both my son's and daughter's leagues 90% of games this season have been played in a great spirit. Similarly with the JPL, no issues at all. I think strong refs who know their powers are important. The young refs starting out should only ref the under 12s down in my opinion. When I ref games I have no issues because I won't accept I'll discipline. The ref has ultimate authority and can even abandon a game if he/she feels fit. wouldn’t need strong refs if the kids and parents behaved themselves. my god it’s kids football! 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
And Its Smith Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 41 minutes ago, sglosbcfc said: Just to give balance, I'm involved at Longwell Green and in both my son's and daughter's leagues 90% of games this season have been played in a great spirit. Similarly with the JPL, no issues at all. I think strong refs who know their powers are important. The young refs starting out should only ref the under 12s down in my opinion. When I ref games I have no issues because I won't accept I'll discipline. The ref has ultimate authority and can even abandon a game if he/she feels fit. Maybe we have different views on what constitutes an issue. Parents shout at refs every single game I am at and that is under 12s. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sglosbcfc Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 1 hour ago, frenchred said: wouldn’t need strong refs if the kids and parents behaved themselves. my god it’s kids football! Wouldn't need strong teachers if kids behaved at school, wouldn't need strong coppers if kids behaved on the street etc etc. Pie in the sky 43 minutes ago, And Its Smith said: Maybe we have different views on what constitutes an issue. Parents shout at refs every single game I am at and that is under 12s. Just giving balance of my experience. I'm not naive enough to think it doesn't happen of course. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frenchred Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 Just now, sglosbcfc said: Wouldn't need strong teachers if kids behaved at school, wouldn't need strong coppers if kids behaved on the street etc etc. Pie in the sky that response just makes me think you may be part of the problem Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sglosbcfc Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 Just now, frenchred said: that response just makes me think you may be part of the problem Trust me I'm a pillar of society. I only get irate when City lose 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lanterne Rouge Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 16 minutes ago, sglosbcfc said: Trust me I'm a pillar of society. I only get irate when City lose So you`re angry most of the time then......................... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barrs Court Red Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 Was at Bristol Rovers Supporters club a couple of weeks back, the game on the pitch next to ours had to be stopped, because two parents were squaring up - an under 9s girls game. The respect line that gets put out before games is a joke. Youth football could solve 90% of its issues if parents were banned!, and that’s not something I say lightly, as watching my kids play is a real highlight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
And Its Smith Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 31 minutes ago, Barrs Court Red said: Was at Bristol Rovers Supporters club a couple of weeks back, the game on the pitch next to ours had to be stopped, because two parents were squaring up - an under 9s girls game. The respect line that gets put out before games is a joke. Youth football could solve 90% of its issues if parents were banned!, and that’s not something I say lightly, as watching my kids play is a real highlight. When it was first used the respect line seemed to work as a visual reminder to not be a dick. Unfortunately that has now worn off Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cowshed Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 19 hours ago, Silvio Dante said: You may have seen the ITV news this evening on this: https://www.itv.com/news/westcountry/2022-10-28/abuse-violence-and-disrespect-sees-u16-football-league-suspended The AYL has been suspended at U16 level this weekend after several incidents - including assault by a parent. As a coach of youth football, I wholeheartedly agree that bad behaviour on the sidelines and the pitch need to be stamped out. However… - This punishes all clubs, not just the guilty ones - The matches are being rescheduled so there is no “loss” of games. Indeed, as it’s half term, this may even benefit the relevant clubs. I can’t for the life of me understand why they didn’t just penalise the clubs in question. Understand it sends a message but sending a message of your club losing points is so much more effective. Nationally leagues are being suspended. This month - Referee speaks out as Merseyside youth league suspend weekend matches to raise awareness of abuse | ITV News Granada In regards to one of the teams involved they are serial offenders. That a game was abandoned involving that particular South Bristol side is no surprise at all. That club itself is banned from numerous club tournaments. The Somerset FA should be intervening. Nationally there is a respect problem. We can see at the zenith of the game officials being treated with contempt. Abuse of referees is approved of, ignored, part of the football. That culture of abuse is a contagen that infects the entire pyramid. Stamping out the culture of abuse starts from the top. All have a collective responsibility to the game. 18 hours ago, Silvio Dante said: I think I agree in part and disagree in part. In the HML it’s non competitive but there is still natural competition and that wouldn’t change if it was formal league or friendly. I don’t really therefore agree with that. Where I think you are right is that it isn’t right (unless they’ve moved) for kids from Portishead playing for Hanham or similar. That’s a total joke. It should be about playing with your mates (or other local kids) and forming the bonds and learning how to work together and rely on each other. It means more that way - but I have (even at U8 when I coached at that age) seen coaches give bollockings at HT which can’t be right. I realise I’m totally lucky in that I have a really good group of parents who understand that it’s as much about having fun as it is winning the game. It only works if coaches and parents are on the same page. Its normal, not a joke. Some kids want to win, thats why they play, some want to be environments where they are challenged, some kids have differing needs (coaching and learning styles), some dont want to play with their less skilled mates .. The reaasons a child plays football are highly variable (intrinsic and extrinsic drivers). One local side wont fit all kids, and that applies to us the coaches. 17 hours ago, Miah Dennehy said: I didn't realise HML was non competitive , it wasn't when I was involved. I just think taking away the league structure would-hopefully- take away the focus from winning games and make it more about learning how to play the game and enjoying it. I have lost count of the amount of times I have heard youth coaches talk about 'must win' games . Leagues are linked to age related priorities. Up to U11 its fun and developing skill. The HML is structured in to leagues and that is a developmental necessity. The standards are widely different. There are clubs linked to football schools, or running their own (one has City coaches) that by their nature start at U7 with more skilled kids. Post U11 football is train to compete till U16 ..Theoretically. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
petehinton Posted October 29, 2022 Report Share Posted October 29, 2022 3 hours ago, Barrs Court Red said: Was at Bristol Rovers Supporters club a couple of weeks back, the game on the pitch next to ours had to be stopped, because two parents were squaring up - an under 9s girls game. The respect line that gets put out before games is a joke. Youth football could solve 90% of its issues if parents were banned!, and that’s not something I say lightly, as watching my kids play is a real highlight. BRSC been some of worst experiences at games I’ve watched too tbh.Avon Athletic also notoriously bad. Really don’t get it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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