mozo Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Okay, forget your petty squabbles over Bush, Blair, Bin Laden, Bombs, boring stuff like that...let's get down to the nitty gritty here, imagine the future:The year is 2026 (or whatever, who cares it's not bleedin Star Trek) and cosmetic surgery has evolved somewhat. The en vogue, de regeur of plastic surgury in the future is having parts of animals attached to our human bodies.So, if you could have any single part of any animal's anatomy (two parts if they come in a pair) what would it be and why? I've thrown down the gauntlet and the gloves are off, so debate and debate hard people.(this is like Question Time with one of those Dimbleby in-breds!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dagest Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 I'm becoming incresingly concerned about you Mozo. And I'm not referring to the fact you were on here at 01.00.Anyway, I'd have wings for obvious reasons you oddball. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTFiGO!?! Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 More bizarre Mozoian stimulation for me to mull over in my otherwise pointless life I see.Well I would say a certain organ of the horses anatomy but I don't really want a down-grade in size so when you say pairs, (it'd have to be four pairs) I think having eight legs like the octopus would be pretty cool - nightmare doing up your shoelaces though I s'pose, still, a sacrifice worth making.'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''...stop pressuring me, just stop pressuring me, stop pressuring me - it makes me want to scream...(Wacko) ''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sophs Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 When I saw the thread title, I thought you had links, or pictures of animal people, or something Would have to be wings, for the same reasons . Alternately, having something snazzy like night vision would be good too, although I'm not sure how that would work. Cats' eyes? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riaz Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Okay, forget your petty squabbles over Bush, Blair, Bin Laden, Bombs, boring stuff like that...let's get down to the nitty gritty here, imagine the future:The year is 2026 (or whatever, who cares it's not bleedin Star Trek) and cosmetic surgery has evolved somewhat. The en vogue, de regeur of plastic surgury in the future is having parts of animals attached to our human bodies.So, if you could have any single part of any animal's anatomy (two parts if they come in a pair) what would it be and why? I've thrown down the gauntlet and the gloves are off, so debate and debate hard people.(this is like Question Time with one of those Dimbleby in-breds!)Well, I've already got a horse's............................................ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STA-BS14 Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Well, I've already got a horse's............................................Arse? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barry_manc Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 There's a new type of pipe in China at the moment whereby you can smoke anything you like (they like Opium but also smoke cigs) via an animal so that all the bad effects (cancer and coughing and nicotine stains) stay in the animal and all the good effects (having a cig, being wasted) are passed onto the human. Isn't that good! It's not quite surgery but they're doing Animal/Human ######-about-type stuff for laughs which is what the original point was, right?I'd get beaver teeth put in. It seems to have faired well for Ronaldhino.After I'd had boobs put in Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dinky Gems Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 After I'd had boobs put in Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hilltop red Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 wings and gills.and a shark fin to have fun at the beach scaring tourists Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barry_manc Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 After I'd had boobs put in Boobs? In yourself or in an animal?Anyone else a little concerned? xxxxOn myself! If we're talking about shifting bits and bobs around from one being to the next why cant I have boobs? I'd never go out I'd just sit in all day every day playing with them....You're right this is concerning.wings and gills.and a shark fin to have fun at the beach scaring touristsYes, defo gills and a fin, that way, one day, we might be able to get a boy that could swim faster than a shark. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hilltop red Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 On myself! If we're talking about shifting bits and bobs around from one being to the next why cant I have boobs? I'd never go out I'd just sit in all day every day playing with them....You're right this is concerning.Yes, defo gills and a fin, that way, one day, we might be able to get a boy that could swim faster than a shark. good ole garath Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barry_manc Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 good ole garathEh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hilltop red Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Eh? the office Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mozo Posted March 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 I'm becoming incresingly concerned about you Mozo. And I'm not referring to the fact you were on here at 01.00.Anyway, I'd have wings for obvious reasons you oddball.Ahh but look Dagest, I've captured their little imaginations. You'll see people at Ashton Gate wistfully flapping their arms, thinking, 'one day...'.In fact it wouldn't surprise me if word gets around that this kind of surgery actually exists and some Lib Dem'll raise the issue disapprovingly at Prime Ministers Question Time: 'Mr Prime Minister, is it really ethical that children as young as 13 are legally allowed to have rhino horns attached to their face?'Look man, I tried the high-brow stuff on the favourite writers thread and it got boring. This however is preparing for the future.I'd like a giraffe's neck so that I could look round corners from twenty feet away, not-to-mention the advantage when checking out birds' cleavage.Elephant's trunks are pretty handy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sir Colby-Tit Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 At last, a proper debate.I'd have a cat's flexible spine so I could sort myself out when the missus won't put out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mozo Posted March 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 At last, a proper debate.I'd have a cat's flexible spine so I could sort myself out when the missus won't put out.And I though my cat was just cleaning himself!Yep, none of that pretentious university codswollap here. Real issues concerning real people.Hedgehog spikes anyone? Or maybe a tortoise shell? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sophs Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 I'd like a giraffe's neck so that I could look round corners from twenty feet away, not-to-mention the advantage when checking out birds' cleavage.Or barry_mancs... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mozo Posted March 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Or barry_mancs... I'd crane my neck and have a gander Sophs if he was infront of me at the bus-top wearing one of those low-cut tops that dirt-bags like him can't get enough of!What's happening to my mind....? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dagest Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Ahh but look Dagest, I've captured their little imaginations. You'll see people at Ashton Gate wistfully flapping their arms, thinking, 'one day...'.In fact it wouldn't surprise me if word gets around that this kind of surgery actually exists and some Lib Dem'll raise the issue disapprovingly at Prime Ministers Question Time: 'Mr Prime Minister, is it really ethical that children as young as 13 are legally allowed to have rhino horns attached to their face?'Look man, I tried the high-brow stuff on the favourite writers thread and it got boring. This however is preparing for the future.I'd like a giraffe's neck so that I could look round corners from twenty feet away, not-to-mention the advantage when checking out birds' cleavage.Elephant's trunks are pretty handy.That's all very well, but what about when your in WH Smith looking for your favourite publication Railways Monthly and it's on the bottom shelf some where? You'd have to stand so far back that you wouldn't even be able to read the cover.And what about when your working down your alottment? You need to plant some seed or check for Blackfly and your heads 20ft up in the air? You're going to need some very long-arms as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barry_manc Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 the officeAh yes, sorry, forgot what I was on about then.I'd like a giraffe's neck so that I could look round corners from twenty feet away, not-to-mention the advantage when checking out birds' cleavage.Elephant's trunks are pretty handy.Did you know that a giraffe can kill a lion with one kick!!!And that they are born with hooves!They might look camp, but call a griaffe gay and he'll kick your face off.Or barry_mancs... ?I'd crane my neck and have a gander Sophs if he was infront of me at the bus-top wearing one of those low-cut tops that dirt-bags like him can't get enough of!What's happening to my mind....?Dirteh dirteh bashstad. I don't wear low neck tops I'm a much classier class of cross dresser. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mozo Posted March 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 That's all very well, but what about when your in WH Smith looking for your favourite publication Railways Monthly and it's on the bottom shelf some where? You'd have to stand so far back that you wouldn't even be able to read the cover.And what about when your working down your alottment? You need to plant some seed or check for Blackfly and your heads 20ft up in the air? You're going to need some very long-arms as well.How do you know so much about my life? I bet Fred Astaire wished he had hooves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dagest Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 How do you know so much about my life? I bet Fred Astaire wished he had hooves.I'm stalking you. I can't believe you haven't noticed. Just take a look out of your caravan window at the desperate looking guy with the Robbie Williams t-shirt behind the skip - yep, that's me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mozo Posted March 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 I'm stalking you. I can't believe you haven't noticed. Just take a look out of your caravan window at the desperate looking guy with the Robbie Williams t-shirt behind the skip - yep, that's me.I'll be honest when I went online at lunch today, I'd completely forgot that I'd started this thread late last night. I nearly wet myself at some at some the responses and it's only going to encourage me to come up with another such talking point. I consider this forum reminiscent of the Parisian cafes of the eighteenth century where the 'philosophes' would debate the deeper meanings of science, religion and art. I can imagine Voltaire turning to Rousseau in 1754 and saying "'ere Jean-Jacques, would you rather 'have a chimp's tail or a snake's tongue?". Naturally, Rousseau spat at Voltaire for wasting his valuable thinking time and went off to write his 'discourse on inequality'. Voltaire's 'Candide' was initially about a fella with a pelican beak, but his publishing company wouldn't go with it. Dagest, if I had an owl's neck I'd be able to check if any stalkers were lurking near the 'mozo mansion' (my caravan). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dagest Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 I'll be honest when I went online at lunch today, I'd completely forgot that I'd started this thread late last night. I nearly wet myself at some at some the responses and it's only going to encourage me to come up with another such talking point. I consider this forum reminiscent of the Parisian cafes of the eighteenth century where the 'philosophes' would debate the deeper meanings of science, religion and art. I can imagine Voltaire turning to Rousseau in 1754 and saying "'ere Jean-Jacques, would you rather 'have a chimp's tail or a snake's tongue?". Naturally, Rousseau spat at Voltaire for wasting his valuable thinking time and went off to write his 'discourse on inequality'. Voltaire's 'Candide' was initially about a fella with a pelican beak, but his publishing company wouldn't go with it. Dagest, if I had an owl's neck I'd be able to check if any stalkers were lurking near the 'mozo mansion' (my caravan).Ah yes the Philosophes, marvellous chaps. I'm much more of a Diderot fan myself. I especially like his pithy little "Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest." Voltaire was cool too, though I like Micromegas just as much as Candide. And Voltaire is definitely preferable to Rousseau (excepting his "Man was born free, but everywhere he is in chains") because he was just so full of bloody contradictions. How can he write La Nouvelle Heloise, but have absolutely no contact with all his own children? Voltaire in his A Prophecy shows what a complete arse Rousseau was.Anyway, how do you explain this becoming a high brow thread after your earlier intentions? It's a classic paradox. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hilltop red Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 They might look camp, but call a griaffe gay and he'll kick your face off. new thread about which are the campest looking animals coming up.otib is about to hit a new high. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mozo Posted March 9, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 Ah yes the Philosophes, marvellous chaps. I'm much more of a Diderot fan myself. I especially like his pithy little "Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest." Voltaire was cool too, though I like Micromegas just as much as Candide. And Voltaire is definitely preferable to Rousseau (excepting his "Man was born free, but everywhere he is in chains") because he was just so full of bloody contradictions. How can he write La Nouvelle Heloise, but have absolutely no contact with all his own children? Voltaire in his A Prophecy shows what a complete arse Rousseau was.Anyway, how do you explain this becoming a high brow thread after your earlier intentions? It's a classic paradox.Just when I thought I'd dragged the intelligent Mr Dagest right down to my juvenile level I foolishly presented him with an intellectual opening (cue Frankie Howard's smutty response - does he use this forum?). If only Adam Smith had spent more time day-dreaming about what life would be like with elephant ears. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BB. Posted March 9, 2006 Report Share Posted March 9, 2006 If I had the wings of a sparrow,If I had the arse of a crowe.....To be as athletic as a cheeta could be useful. Thinking about it is giving me the hump... bu dum tish Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barry_manc Posted March 10, 2006 Report Share Posted March 10, 2006 new thread about which are the campest looking animals coming up.otib is about to hit a new high. We have come to a new juncture, A WHOLE NEW WORLD (sing wit' meh) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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