Bristol Oil Services

Our fans are (still) asleep, old chap. Both literally and metap . xzzzzzz

One of them a 58 year old, who recently had a hip replacement my weekend newspaper reliably informs me. ICF "Hip Replacement Squad" v Alkmaar Baby Squad. No contest. The ICF showing all their experience, they "set up" superbly, the Alkmaar mob tactically naive.

We ran on the pitch at Northampton one year before kick off, so you just never know.

Stevie Neville scoring at Eastville is ok, then? Good. I wasn't sure but you have put my mind at ease now.

Yes, luck must be factored in. Often forget to mention this. Thing is, we finished 14th and have bobbed around 17th - 14th most of the season. With a bit more luck, we might've finished 13th, or 12th. Not a lot of point. Hence my earlier mention of the importance of being "there or thereabouts," ie within arm's length of 6th. And the other thing about that is, being there once (2018/19) in 8 seasons lengthens the odds on being in "luck," particularly if it's a season where those with money are up together and not floundering. To be in with a shout we need (or might need; Huddersfield didn't) two, three or four seasons in and around the play-offs at the business end of the season (January and February doesn't count), April and May. Then we might get "lucky." By which I mean, finish 6th or higher, then have a chance. Sadly, 2007/8 was a bit of a one-off/fluke. 2018/19 was more by design I would say, building on 2017/18. But both saw us drop away though from where we need to be to take real advantage of "luck." 2008 in particular seemed to be built on sand. If or when this happens, and we are "lucky" enough to find ourselves in the play-offs then we will need yet more luck. Meaning we might need two, three or four cracks at the agony of the play-offs. It's SL's, and now Nige's, and the new CEO fella's, responsibility to manoeuvre us into a position where "luck" might make a big, criticao difference, give us the helping hand we need. We haven’t as yet done anything like enough to bemoan our own luck, or lack of it (other than with penalties).

I'd say "opportunity" in this division might mean seasons - and they don't always occur but they do every now and again - where the Parachute Payment clubs are in a muddle or even a mess and not going to finish top six. Like this season. Clubs like us then just need to be ready, top half, "there or thereabouts." But we were miles off, still addressing the muddle and mistakes of the Ashton nonsense.

It's frustrating, thank you Italian Dave. Italian Dave gives a Master Class here in understated, calm emotional regulation. Any parents of children look at my emotional outpouring/diaorhea and then see I-tie Dave's cool "there, there; now, now" response, nailing all the feeling and the outpouring and the wailing and g-nashing of teeth with one word: frustration. That's how you do it, folks. Italian Dave sits down beside me and listens quietly whilst I rant/spout shite, stroking my shoulder, then naming the feeling. Italian Dave: "There, there Bristol Oil, I know it's frustrating supporting Bristol City. Worse things happen at the Rovers mind, you dry yer eyes and Mrs Italian Dave will have yer tea ready." Bristol Oil Services: "It’s so unfair, Dave. Luton, ffs!" Italian Dave: "I know, I know. You eat yer tea up and I'll buy you an ice cream." Bristol Oil Services: "Thanks Dad, er, Dave. We will get in the play offs won't we Dave?" Italian Dave: "Course we will." Bristol Oil Services curls up beside Italian Dave and falls asleep, and Italian Dave returns his gaze to OTIB. All is right with the world again. All is calm. Love you, Italian Dave. Night, night.

Cannot it not be both? First up, it's a joke, a wheeze. Second, it's a joke and a howl at the moon. Howling at the moon, or in modern parlance, a great big: FFS! Have you seen Cov's team? And squad? They take Kasey bleedin' Palmer off us - the Poster Boy of Bristol City's "cosy club" easy-wage waster, clueless club, nonsense - and end up in the Play offs final. Ffs! You couldn't make it up. They've got Liam Kelly anchoring midfield - ffs! There's us fretting and whimpering about Alex Scott going, and what we gonna do, and how we gonna cope (Bristol City learned helplessness coursing through our veins), pathetic! How have Cov managed without Alex Scott? And Cov's owners - the much reviled Sisu or whatever they're called. While we have the greatly respected Steve Lansdown. "How will we cope/be careful what you wish for" whispers and whines otib as the prospect of SL shuffling off this mortal football club nears every day/week/month/transfer window. Who knew you could do well with vile owners? Ffs! And Cov's nomadic existence. And Luton's crap ground. Who knew you could compete in the Championship without a £50m refurb, or a concourse, or five middle aged blokes playing Guns n bleedin Roses (badly) at an ear-splitting volume right next to yer ear'ole on a small platform before the game while you're trying to make your way to the turnt-stiles and have a quiet moan to yer mate about Lansdown/Kasey Palmer/Marlon Pack? Like what we used to do, when AG was AG. And then there's the lump that is Kyle Mc bleedin Fanzine - who knew you could defend adequately in the Championship and finish in the top six then keep two clean sheets in a play off semi against a "much fancied" opponent and the division's second highest scorers with a slow, lumbering lower division relic that looked slow and lumbering last time we were in L1 and was plucked from Burton blinkin Albion? Who knew you could do all this without going to Chelsea and giving them £8m - eight million - and spending C****t (or Mr Popodopolous) knows how many more millions on wages for a bloke to hang around at the back stopping the opposition from scoring when they want. Who knew that? Not Steve Lansdown, I don't think. Ffs! We had been led to believe that you need Parachute payments, you need a fancy stadium, a High School Musical Performance Centre, a wage bill this and a budget that, and a coach with drones and new fangled techniques that take 35 training sessions to get anywhere near understanding his genius, and a cuddly home-grown owner not like them dodgy overseas ones or them vile, capitalist in-it-fer-themselves hedge fund ones, that you need all manner of things, to "compete" at this level. And it turnts out, it's just not true. You can even compete in this division with a spine of Kyle McFadzean and Liam Kelly, and Kasey Palmer on yer physio's couch; or in a shitty little old ground, with crowds a touch bigger than The Few's. And it makes you/some want to scream: Ffs! That's this thread. Sort of.

Following your logic there then, it must be the case that, prior to their promotion about 4 or 5 years ago, Brighton had a "top flight pedigree" that "we don't have" ? And the same for Brentford?

Who will make the Championship play-offs first: Bristol City or Wrexham? Bristol City or Notts County?

That Coventry City is long gone. It's nothing to do with that history. Same for Luton really. What grates is the oft repeated - defeatist, can't-do attitude - of "we can't compete with parachute payment clubs" of people on here excusing abysmal football decision making by our club. Truth is, we can't compete with: Preston Millwall Cov Luton Various other minnows/middling Championship clubs. What also grates is an owner that cannot "own" this truth

And that Norwich one

Cov v Luton. Watch it and weep, Steve Lansdown

Where were Cov and Luton in 2018 when Lee and Ashton were here, signing Liam thingy and Louis Dionky and Ryan K***,, making us a PL club in waiting? In the 4th bloody division. Ffs.

What you are really trying to say, is: "****ing hell. How do we make such a pig's ear of this division?"

Luton v Bournemouth, MOTD 23/24.

"We can't compete with ..... " (parachute payment clubs, like, er, Luton and Cov)

Doesn't work like that (mate)

De Bruyne was in third when he scored, mate. If he'd run any further he'd have had to change up to fourth

You'd've loved Peter Swales, back in the day.

They've already "lost" a player or two, both to us

Love the bloke on there, proper Bristol accent, does the traffic gert proper: "Free mile 'awld up on the A Firty Eigh' and there's un accident on the A Free o Free .... "

Tony Bloom, mate. Ducker n diver. Likes a flutter. Nudge, nudge. Say no more.

Thing is, they're being chased by Man City. Whereas when Leicester were on the brink they were being chased by Spurs, which is like being chased down by Larry Grayson/a hamster/something not-scary

Thanks, mate. Can you let us know what time MOTD is on this evening?