bearded_red Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 R.I.P Gary Speed. Always came over as a thoroughly decent, down to earth and humble man. Clearly loved the game of Football and as others have said it was a complete shock. Although you can obviously never know who is suffering from such demons, he would have been the last possible person that I would have guessed! Always seemed upbeat and I was watching him on Football Focus just over 30 hours ago! A sad loss for Football and my thoughts go out to his wife and two sons. Nobody can begin to imagine what they are going through. Once again, R.I.P. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Red_Jim Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Well, he's not going through anything now, is he. Unlike his sons. What is it about depression that I don't understand which justifies denying your children of a father? I wonder if he had the courage to look them in the eye and say goodbye to them before subjecting them to a lifetime of failing to understand why they weren't worth living for? I take your point, and I agree to an extent - but depression is so consuming I imagine Gary didn't have anything left mentally. It's so so sad - I perhaps don't think we should be debating the rights and wrongs at the moment (but I do understand where you're coming from) and we should just pay our respects and leave our thoughts and sympathy with his family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beaverface Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Does anyone know if this is depression related? I've not read anywhere that he's been suffering from it. Playing Devil's Advocate, maybe he had money trouble, gambling addiction or has been questioned by the Police for "something"??? Until we hear more, you can't blame depression or say he's cowardly etc.. until the full story comes out. R I P regardless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Northern Red Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Completely shocked as well. Just been listening to 606 with Robbie Savage, and I must say one of the saddest programmes I have ever listened to. Just can't get my head around it. RIP Speedo Yeah I heard that too, it was a really hard listen, Savage broke down in tears a few times during it. Fair play to him for choosing to do it, you could tell by listening that he's in a state of total disbelief over what's happened. He said that when he got the phone call this morning, he was convinced someone was winding him up, and he even tried ringing Speed's mobile to get hold of him, but it rang out and went to voicemail. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tunneller Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Yeah I heard that too, it was a really hard listen, Savage broke down in tears a few times during it. Fair play to him for choosing to do it, you could tell by listening that he's in a state of total disbelief over what's happened. He said that when he got the phone call this morning, he was convinced someone was winding him up, and he even tried ringing Speed's mobile to get hold of him, but it rang out and went to voicemail. I didn`t hear this broadcast, but the more and more I read and see of Robbie Savage the more he seems like a top bloke. None of us will ever understand what drove Gary to do what he did. What a decision to make, but pressures affect different people in different ways. All I can say of him is he always seemed to be a fair open and honest guy who was probably one of the best midfielders to play in the UK for the last 30 years.I am sure there will be 100`s of folk devastated by these events. Great memories of his skill and amazing ability especially in Howard Wilkinsons brilliant side that won the last Div 1 title, who, in my view were one of the greatest sides we have had the pleasure to see in British football . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radstock Red Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 A few should be ashamed giving opinions of they way Gary Speed has gone. Not the time people! My thoughts are with his family. R.I.P Gary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
glynriley Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 A few should be ashamed giving opinions of they way Gary Speed has gone. Not the time people! My thoughts are with his family. R.I.P Gary. Well said. Any form of speculation or vilification , are uncalled for. Sympathies to the family and messages of condolence are all that's needed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ateyomike Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 having a son with mental health issues we live every day as it comes it just shows what we may think as successful carrer of a good footballer who has done wonders with wales we just dont know what goes on behind the scenes it seems at the mo very few knew about any sort of depression that can show by those who suffer how well it can be hidden just so sad for for everyone who knew him as friend and even more his family just hope sone good can out of this terrible tragedy god bless you gary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CotswoldRed Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Its a natural thing to 'defend' Gary Speed's actions at a time like this. His mental state was clearly not a good one. But it also seems taboo to even suggest he was a coward. Maybe he was a coward, maybe he wasn't. I doubt we've heard the end of this and there will be further facts in time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chinapig Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Its a natural thing to 'defend' Gary Speed's actions at a time like this. His mental state was clearly not a good one. But it also seems taboo to even suggest he was a coward. Maybe he was a coward, maybe he wasn't. I doubt we've heard the end of this and there will be further facts in time. We do not know if it was his problem so can only talk in general terms about the sometimes devastating effects of clinical depression. In general terms though I can only assume that those who dismiss the terrible suffering the condition can cause have never suffered from it or watched helplessly as somebody they loved has. Mental illness is no more a moral choice than physical but a sad fact that has blighted and blights many lives. From personal experience I would not wish it on my worst enemy. Bear in mind that if the kind of attitude to mental illness that prevailed 100 years ago applied now soldiers suffering PTSD as a result of their experiences in Iraq or Afghanistan would be regarded as cowards too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
formerly known as ivan Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 You are trying to assign rational thought to someone who was in all probability not able to think rationally. I've had the misfortune to have three people I know take their own lives, one a very close friend. The only things I think you can say with certainty is that you will never know for sure why they did it and their thought processses were not the same as yours or mine at the time it happened. He was an international manager who would probably have been medically checked week after week. If there was any signs of depression especially to the point he was suicidal he would have been given a break from his role a Wales manager and it would have been common knowledge. I know exactly what depression is as a couple of people very close to me suffer quite badly from it. Nothing changes the fact that that what he had done was for his own benefit without giving a shit for the people near to him. Rest in peace! He probably will now but his kids will be in a living hell because of his selfish act. This is my view in it not just because he is in the lime light but anyone who has done what he has Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simon uk Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 RIP Gary Speed, a very sad loss. The guy was and is the epitome of what a professional footballer should be, and not only that, but he had a marathon career, and after 20 years of premier league football, no one has a bad word to say about him, which must be a unique achievement. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chinapig Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 He was an international manager who would probably have been medically checked week after week. If there was any signs of depression especially to the point he was suicidal he would have been given a break from his role a Wales manager and it would have been common knowledge. I know exactly what depression is as a couple of people very close to me suffer quite badly from it. Nothing changes the fact that that what he had done was for his own benefit without giving a shit for the people near to him. Rest in peace! He probably will now but his kids will be in a living hell because of his selfish act. This is my view in it not just because he is in the lime light but anyone who has done what he has Then I suggest you read up on the case of Robert Enke I referred to earlier. An international player good enough for Barca and nobody in the game had a clue about his condition. I doubt tests for depression are a feature of the average medical in football. Football is a macho culture that regards mental illness as un-manly and weak. In such an environment it is hardly surprising sufferers hide it and they and their loved ones pay the price. Terrible waste that might at least be reduced if such attitudes did not prevail in football, and beyond. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Betelgeuse Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Then I suggest you read up on the case of Robert Enke I referred to earlier. An international player good enough for Barca and nobody in the game had a clue about his condition. I doubt tests for depression are a feature of the average medical in football. Football is a macho culture that regards mental illness as un-manly and weak. In such an environment it is hardly surprising sufferers hide it and they and their loved ones pay the price. Terrible waste that might at least be reduced if such attitudes did not prevail in football, and beyond. I thought Enke was treated for depression after his daughter died? I thought I read that somewhere? Another sad story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CardiffBlackLabel Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Whatever the circumstances, there is a time and a place for speculation, and that is further in the future than several hours after a mans death is announced. One of the least savoury aspects of the internet that is. RIP Gary. Your good work with Wales won't be wasted. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donald Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 I wonder if a lifetime of club football as a player, coach then manager with the daily banter, then the switch to the remoteness of international management has had an effect. Many players find it tough after they retire because they miss the "dressing room" environment that they grew up in. Many ex-pro's find it hard to adjust. And I'll admit that I missed and struggled when I stopped playing full time. But Is purely speculation, however something just doesn't seem right with this all, was it rumoured depression or a media story on the brink of being broken, regardless. He looked to be finally turning the welsh team around Feel for his wife and kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chinapig Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 I thought Enke was treated for depression after his daughter died? I thought I read that somewhere? Another sad story. Indeed but suffered for a long time before that before anybody knew and his closest friends in the game had no idea he was suicidal. I have to admit the 5 Live documentary had me in tears. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
formerly known as ivan Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Indeed but suffered for a long time before that before anybody knew and his closest friends in the game had no idea he was suicidal. I have to admit the 5 Live documentary had me in tears. So if he was suicidal after losing a child then that is possibly the only time I could see why someone would do it, as long as they were not leaving behind other children Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CiderPunk Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 He was an international manager who would probably have been medically checked week after week. If there was any signs of depression especially to the point he was suicidal he would have been given a break from his role a Wales manager and it would have been common knowledge. I know exactly what depression is as a couple of people very close to me suffer quite badly from it. Nothing changes the fact that that what he had done was for his own benefit without giving a shit for the people near to him. Rest in peace! He probably will now but his kids will be in a living hell because of his selfish act. This is my view in it not just because he is in the lime light but anyone who has done what he has You should stop chatting bollocks about a subject that you clearly know **** all about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tins Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 So if he was suicidal after losing a child then that is possibly the only time I could see why someone would do it, as long as they were not leaving behind other children Wait to see what it said first. We do not know reasons, don't say something which you will regret. However that may be too late in your case. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ashtonbcfc17 Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Great down to earth man.Always played his football for his passion rather than his pockets. Needed more people like him in the game. Always remember him single handedly tearing us apart for Sheffield United. He was definately making wales pick up their form. However it wouldn't suprise me if the reason why he did it was the fact his wife may have had an affair.Most men struggle at the times.Was always a leader on and off the pitch but when he needed that prowess most he felt he didn't have it anymore and gave up. I mainly feel sorry for the Kids imagine waking up every morning at their age wondering where their father has gone and why?it would be treacherous. Thoughts go to all the family. R.I.P Speedo footballing icon Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
formerly known as ivan Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 You should stop chatting bollocks about a subject that you clearly know **** all about. And you know what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CiderPunk Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 And you know what? My Brother and my Uncle both committed suicide and my Mother also made a serious attempt on her own life, all due to mental illness. Put a sock in it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CalgaryRed Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Remember seeing him destroy us aged 38 at Bramall Lane spring 2008 in our playoff final season. He was immense in every sense. Few players were feared by Roy Keane for example but Speed was. He scored in every Premier League season until 2007-8. Only Giggs also managed that. Really sad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
formerly known as ivan Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 My Brother and my Uncle both committed suicide and my Mother also made a serious attempt on her own life, all due to mental illness. Put a sock in it. And someone very close to me also tried and I told them and stupid and selfish they were to not care about the people whose lives your about to ruin so I feel fully justified in what I say and my views on it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CiderPunk Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 And someone very close to me also tried and I told them and stupid and selfish they were to not care about the people whose lives your about to ruin so I feel fully justified in what I say and my views on it Well you're not because your experience does not paint the full picture. Try to think about that. I hope for your sake that mental illness/clinical depression never consumes you, because if it does grab a hold of you strongly enough and you start to believe that suicide is the way forward, then the chances are that you won't survive it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
formerly known as ivan Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Well you're not because your experience does not paint the full picture. Try to think about that. I hope for your sake that mental illness/clinical depression never consumes you, because if it does grab a hold of you strongly enough and you start to believe that suicide is the way forward, then the chances are that you won't survive it. But I wouldn't ever believe that cus I have my children to make life worth living Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CiderPunk Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 It's understandable that you should say that, but the sad fact is, it's not as simple as that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DIZZYRED Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Of course, it's very sad and that goes without saying. However it is worth remembering that depression (and I mean the medical condition, not the temporary 'down' feeling we all get from time to time when City are bottom of the table etc.) is also an incredibly destructive illness and is underestimated by many who cannot imagine the mental and physical symptoms that come with it. Im sure that a mentally healthy Gary Speed wouldnt for one second consider putting his family through that, the same as anyone else who has done it. Its not a cowards way out, its pure desperation and I feel very sorry for him, and of course, his family. R.I.P. Gary Was in total shock when i heard this. Spot on, my Father has Cronic Depression and it is destructive as i have experienced.... Deepest condolences to his family RIP Gary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
formerly known as ivan Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 There is nothing to suggest it had anything to do with depression anyway. May never know what made him do it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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