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The Moan Thread


Tall King Blox

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Crapped on by a Seagull in the City Centre and having to walk around as though I always have bird shit on my trousers. Picking up a penny and finding a money spider on me all of which convinces me I'm in for good luck.

Don't normally bet on City but with all this money about to come my way a nice chunky double on City to beat Oxford and Real Madrid to beat Sevilla. Both short odds but clearly this is because they are mismatches. Read that Cotts is 'guarding against complacency' so what can go wrong?

Two minutes gone and it's just a case of how many we will win by. Thoughts turn to what I'm going to do with my winnings and how this good luck thing really works..... :grr:

Now, I had a rather profitable punt on Oxford to go through at 7/4. Just a spoiler, you understand...

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People who lifestory (verb, transitive) me at bus stops and railway stations.

I don't want to hear about your hysterectomy, prostate op, drug/alcohol problems, lifelong depression, and your ambitions to be an artist that were thwarted by the Zionist Conspiracy.

There are people paid to listen to this - I wouldn't want to put them out of a job.

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Drivers who pay absolutely no attention to Bikers on the road. Sorry but young women are the very worst offenders. Absolutely NO awareness!!

Cyclists riding two a breast on busy main roads thinking they are Bradley Wiggins holding traffic up. Don't have to pay tax or insurance but still think they got more rights than car drivers.   *****.

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People who ... IN A COMPLETELY EMPTY CHUFFIN CARPARK   ...  park either side of my car, (which I park out of the way) and proceed to leave nice little marks on the car due to shit driving or because they parked so close the doors hit W4NKERS !!!

 

This may have happened again yesterday but I'm fine about it  :grr:

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I am absolutely awful when it comes to being introduced to any bloke who utters the immortal phrase 'I hate football'. It makes me subconsciously decide I don't want to talk to them, so I say nothing.

 

I realise that football is not for everyone, but I cant get over the deeply-ingrained thought that the offending football  (or worse still 'all sports' hater), is in some way mentally retarded and unworthy of attention.

 

Also people who smile faintly, feel pity and appear condescending in response to "I support Bristol City".

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In my experience male football-haters are far more fanatical than even the most rabid Millwall fan. Oddly, this doesn't seem to apply to women. They seem to see at as an amusing foible, like playing trains in the garden.

 

Usually claim to be rugby fans but have never been to a game and when you watch an international game on TV with them it's obvious they don't even know the rules.

 

But every page of their joy of sex book is stuck together.

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Automatic frigging checkout machines like I fought in Sainsburys today.

I swear that when Death comes for me it'll be "UNIDENTIFIED ITEM IN BAGGING AREA" :(

i had this tonight and the supervisor had to check my bags. got home and checked reciept,free washing tabs for me tonight,feels like a lotto win  :clapping:

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50 greatest moments, greatest goals, movie scenes, funniest moments etc

Why the **** cant they just play the scene without constantly cutting back to some ex coronation street actor or Johnny vegas

I have no interest in them talking me through every frame

Just show the clip for god sake

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Usually claim to be rugby fans but have never been to a game and when you watch an international game on TV with them it's obvious they don't even know the rules.

But every page of their joy of sex book is stuck together.

And you really wouldn't want to use their keyboard :o

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People who sit in the middle lane on motorways ( My solution to this is overtaking slowing down so they have overtake then proceeding to speed up so they can't get in flipping them the bird & calling them tossers)

Also people who generally don't do the speed limit on the a370 going under 35mph in a 50 people got places to be ffs I know it takes me 30minutes to get to Ashton Gate from Weston & getting ear ache from the misses for being late picking her up after work because you've got all the time to swan about is annoying.

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50 greatest moments, greatest goals, movie scenes, funniest moments etc

Why the **** cant they just play the scene without constantly cutting back to some ex coronation street actor or Johnny vegas

I have no interest in them talking me through every frame

Just show the clip for god sake

Yep.

When watching clips of the Brazilian World Cup winning side from 1970, I rarely think to myself "hmm I wonder what that bird from 'the Saturdays'....(who wasn't born for another 25 years)....has to say about this".

Whilst we're talking TV programmes has anyone mentioned that ******* garbage Mrs Browns Boys?

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