Referee cautionary report...

[spudski]

...is that the players age or their squad number in the report?

 

[downendcity]

On that basis, there must have been loads of references to being called a "speccy ginger ( or other hair colour) ****" in our refs match reports over recent seasons!

[cidered abroad]

A very sad indictment of how referees are treated by so many players and supporters. It's a wonder that there are any willing to referee matches at any level.

[spudski]

4 minutes ago, cidered abroad said:

A very sad indictment of how referees are treated by so many players and supporters. It's a wonder that there are any willing to referee matches at any level.

Hence my comment re age... obviously wooshed a few..

[Major Isewater]

50 minutes ago, spudski said:

...is that the players age or their squad number in the report?

 

I don’t find this ‘funny’ I’m afraid. Those players are bullies and imbeciles. Let’s say no one wants to referee their matches in the future they are , like Camilla , royally screwed. 
Ref’s, especially at the lower levels, give up their free time for the love of the game. Would you if you had to endure even half of what these people put up with? 

[phantom]

17 minutes ago, spudski said:

Hence my comment re age... obviously wooshed a few..

I must admit it didn't sink in straight away what you meant, but I get what you mean now

 

1 hour ago, downendcity said:

On that basis, there must have been loads of references to being called a "speccy ginger ( or other hair colour) ****" in our refs match reports over recent seasons!

Some people would be surprised what has been included in our reports and those that subsequently get fed back to the club

The more obvious ones are the likes of smoke bombs etc being thrown on the pitch, but goes into detail like the paper aeroplanes being thrown / programs being thrown etc etc

[Lorenzos Only Goal]

Some of the under-8s league referees that my son plays in get abused.  It's ridiculous as it's meant to be fun for the kids, and the rules for kids under 8 are grossly simplified for them.  Some of the parents take it way too seriously; I think because we're in the catchment for the north London academies, they think little Billy will get picked up. 

[Port Said Red]

A good excuse to air the lyrics of HMHB's - The Referees Alphabet.

I have highlighted some of the bits I feel are most relevant to the discussion.

The A is for my authority which many players seem to question, thinking they're somehow going to make me change my mind

B is for babies which a lot of managers cry like after a decision has not gone their way

C is for the continual criticism I receive from the touchline... get back in your technical area!

D is for the dunderheads who seem to think we have a conspiracy against their particular team

E is for the eery silence that echoes around the ground after I've booked the home teams player and its obvious to everyone that he deserved it

F is the farce into which most games would descend if we weren't there

The G is for the gnarled face of someone who's on £90, 000 a week and reckoned he should have had a throw in

H is for handball which has to be intentional and very rarely is if only people would study the rules more

I is for innocence, pleaded by many a doe-eyed defender after they've just scythed down that tricky winger

J is for ju-jitsu, which i quite intend to display given a dark alley and some of the narky blerts I've encountered

K is for the kissing of the badge how ridiculous that looks 6 months later when they're at another club

L is for lip reading, at which you don't need to be an expert to see how odious some people are

M is for the mistakes we sometimes make surely a bit of controversy is part of the games appeal

The N, the N is for the numbskull who during the boxing day game asks me what else i got for christmas besides my whistle..... an afternoon with your wife mate

The O is for offside which many forwards tell me they simply could not have been

The P is for the penalty shootout great drama and no pressure on me

Q is the quiet word i sometimes need to have with some of the more fiery participants i usually choose the word 'pleat'

R is for running backwards a difficult skill which the pundits never seem to appreciate

S is for the suggestion that i should have awarded a card of some sort to a player who's just been awarded a free kick. Sorry i got all that wrong the S again.

Okay the S, the S is the suggestion that i should show a card to an opponent by a player whos been awarded a free kick he himself is more in danger of getting one for that

T is for the 21 man brawl which is basically an embarrassing scene of pushing and shoving

U is for the umpire which i sometimes wish id been instead you never hear a cricket crowd shouting whos the bastard in the hat

The V is for vitriol vilification vendetta and volley of verbal abuse

some good bird noises there by the way

W is for Walter Pidgeon who's Mr Griffiths in 'How Green was my Valley' i  may have started to sound like during this song

'where was the light i thought to see in your eye?'

he says that to a young Huw played by Roddy McDowall

The X

The X represents the sarcastic kiss planted on my forehead by the swarthy Portuguese center half who i just dismissed

The Y is for Yate, the kind of town referees come from

And the Z

Well the Z could be for Zidane, Zico, Zola, Zubizaretta, Zoff

Even Zondervan

but is in fact for the zest with which we approach our work

without this zest for the game we wouldn't become refs

and without refs, well zero

See also Zatopek, Zeus

and Zeal Monachorum

I have a caravan there

static naturally

Wouldn't it be fun if the gave the ref a gun

[Open End Numb Legs]

1 hour ago, Lorenzos Only Goal said:

Some of the under-8s league referees that my son plays in get abused.  It's ridiculous as it's meant to be fun for the kids, and the rules for kids under 8 are grossly simplified for them.  Some of the parents take it way too seriously; I think because we're in the catchment for the north London academies, they think little Billy will get picked up. 

I used to watch my wife's nephew at some prem club academy matches and we were told the only thing allowed was polite applause. No communication with players or officials.

Unfortunately my sister in law's brain seemed to project forward in time to seeing her son's earning potential when he might be playing in the Prem and Champions League. It became a bit of an obsession for her, a source of understandable pride which got out of hand as the years passed. He didn't make it and I often think that the lost potential earnings still affects her behaviour and in the same way, that of abusive parents. They see refs as blockers to their child's potential, but behind it I think are the enormous wages that are being paid to the top 1%.

[Swede]

Having run the line for my son's youth team and endured abuse in various forms, I really wonder why any referees do this job and not because of the small fees they get. 

Without the people to carry out these tasks at grass root level there would be no football.

It all comes down to respect, but that starts at the top and if you see the top professionals / managers questioning the officials then we have no hope.

Look at rugby & American Football as examples. We can learn so much from how they officiate games.

[Steve Watts]

1 hour ago, Port Said Red said:

D is for the dunderheads who seem to think we have a conspiracy against their particular team

Thought this might refer to us and our penalty conspiracy but it doesn't line up with when we were sponsored by that random betting firm!

But seriously.....

As a coach at grassroots level, I get really disappointed to see the stuff that goes on, and some of that comes from the opposition coaches!  @Silvio Dante and I teach the kids to respect the referee and hush them up if they start moaning at them.  Naturally we call for decisions, but that's it.  If it's not given it's not given.  No amount of bitching is going to change their minds.  Many of these referees are kids themselves and the stick they get is awful, especially given their age.  As other coaches on here will know, parents tend to mysteriously get a phone call when we head in their general direction with a flag, leaving us to run the line.  This exposes us to the parents of both teams for one half.  Several times I've turned around to parents to tell them to get off the referees back unless they want to pick up a whistle themselves, but that shouldn't be necessary.

One match this season, the opposition players (under 12's, mind!) were bitching and moaning all through the match, but you could see exactly where they were getting it from as the coaches were doing the same, often straying 5/10 yards onto the pitch to remonstrate a decision.  Change needs to happen across all levels and all types of participant though whether it be coaches, players or spectators.

As an addendum and bit of advice to other coaches, we seem to have finally cracked the flag duties problem, by asking for two volunteers to do a half each on rotation.  When they know they can concentrate on what their kids are doing for half the match it makes them far more agreeable to doing it every few matches. The hypocrisy is not lost on me though that Silv & I can't solely focus on our own kids at all because we're keeping an eye of all of their kids as a team, but we'll take the win where we can!

[Silvio Dante]

24 minutes ago, Steve Watts said:

Thought this might refer to us and our penalty conspiracy but it doesn't line up with when we were sponsored by that random betting firm!

But seriously.....

As a coach at grassroots level, I get really disappointed to see the stuff that goes on, and some of that comes from the opposition coaches!  @Silvio Dante and I teach the kids to respect the referee and hush them up if they start moaning at them.  Naturally we call for decisions, but that's it.  If it's not given it's not given.  No amount of bitching is going to change their minds.  Many of these referees are kids themselves and the stick they get is awful, especially given their age.  As other coaches on here will know, parents tend to mysteriously get a phone call when we head in their general direction with a flag, leaving us to run the line.  This exposes us to the parents of both teams for one half.  Several times I've turned around to parents to tell them to get off the referees back unless they want to pick up a whistle themselves, but that shouldn't be necessary.

One match this season, the opposition players (under 12's, mind!) were bitching and moaning all through the match, but you could see exactly where they were getting it from as the coaches were doing the same, often straying 5/10 yards onto the pitch to remonstrate a decision.  Change needs to happen across all levels and all types of participant though whether it be coaches, players or spectators.

As an addendum and bit of advice to other coaches, we seem to have finally cracked the flag duties problem, by asking for two volunteers to do a half each on rotation.  When they know they can concentrate on what their kids are doing for half the match it makes them far more agreeable to doing it every few matches. The hypocrisy is not lost on me though that Silv & I can't solely focus on our own kids at all because we're keeping an eye of all of their kids as a team, but we'll take the win where we can!

I reffed a game for one of our U11 teams yesterday - was more of a “development” level and you can’t help but see the difference - it’s part age and part level. Even though it’s only a year from where we play, the intensity and pressure is far less - and the kids were far more polite. 

Theres definitely a difference between - not even HML and AYL - but moreso the top 3 -4 divisions and the bottom 3-4. I think at the lower levels you tend to get more kids (and managers) playing for the love of football. At our level, it is more intense and you do end up with more coaches and players who are “win at all costs”. That leads into worse behaviour to officials from players and coaches alike, which is a shame.

But if any of our lot ever get done for dissent, then I don’t think I’ll ever be more disappointed. It’s not how you do things.

[beaverface]

39 minutes ago, Steve Watts said:

Thought this might refer to us and our penalty conspiracy but it doesn't line up with when we were sponsored by that random betting firm!

But seriously.....

As a coach at grassroots level, I get really disappointed to see the stuff that goes on, and some of that comes from the opposition coaches!  @Silvio Dante and I teach the kids to respect the referee and hush them up if they start moaning at them.  Naturally we call for decisions, but that's it.  If it's not given it's not given.  No amount of bitching is going to change their minds.  Many of these referees are kids themselves and the stick they get is awful, especially given their age.  As other coaches on here will know, parents tend to mysteriously get a phone call when we head in their general direction with a flag, leaving us to run the line.  This exposes us to the parents of both teams for one half.  Several times I've turned around to parents to tell them to get off the referees back unless they want to pick up a whistle themselves, but that shouldn't be necessary.

One match this season, the opposition players (under 12's, mind!) were bitching and moaning all through the match, but you could see exactly where they were getting it from as the coaches were doing the same, often straying 5/10 yards onto the pitch to remonstrate a decision.  Change needs to happen across all levels and all types of participant though whether it be coaches, players or spectators.

As an addendum and bit of advice to other coaches, we seem to have finally cracked the flag duties problem, by asking for two volunteers to do a half each on rotation.  When they know they can concentrate on what their kids are doing for half the match it makes them far more agreeable to doing it every few matches. The hypocrisy is not lost on me though that Silv & I can't solely focus on our own kids at all because we're keeping an eye of all of their kids as a team, but we'll take the win where we can!

I've had parents refuse to run the line because, in their words, they don't understand the rules of the game, and yet they're more than happy to complain to me about why x is playing instead of their son, any why is so in so in that position over their son. Some parents definitely put their children on pedestals !!

 

[beaverface]

11 minutes ago, Silvio Dante said:

I reffed a game for one of our U11 teams yesterday - was more of a “development” level and you can’t help but see the difference - it’s part age and part level. Even though it’s only a year from where we play, the intensity and pressure is far less - and the kids were far more polite. 

Theres definitely a difference between - not even HML and AYL - but moreso the top 3 -4 divisions and the bottom 3-4. I think at the lower levels you tend to get more kids (and managers) playing for the love of football. At our level, it is more intense and you do end up with more coaches and players who are “win at all costs”. That leads into worse behaviour to officials from players and coaches alike, which is a shame.

But if any of our lot ever get done for dissent, then I don’t think I’ll ever be more disappointed. It’s not how you do things.

The age I coach at, we've had 4 teams at the same age level for a number of years all moving up year after year, and you can pretty much guarantee that in all that time, the teams we've played in the lower divisions contained some really nice players and parents, and then the higher you go up the divisions, and the higher the standard, the worse they become.

I don't know if the players become more strong willed, or have win at all cost mentality? But the intensity is definitely there.

One thing I have noticed, is that the lower down the leagues you go, the players tend to have multiple interests. So you'll have players who are into climbing, cricket, athletics, kick-boxing, BMXing. Basically other interests outside of football, whereas the top divisions, have players who are pretty much focused on football and football only. I'm also aware of some teams who won't have players play for them, unless they play for a County side also.

[redkev]

I ran / coached a youth team in Bristol from u11s right through to u18s and this was over 10 years ago I finished .

up until u14 all was ok with parents / players etc then as the age went up u15 u/16 then up to u18 the behaviour definitely got a lot worse very quickly . 
Couple of things I can remember one game I had to referee ( no problem ) short story and all that one of our own players was skating on thin ice was just about to get my assistant at the club to sub him and he just had to go ( won’t tell you what he done . Everyone agreed he had to go come off got praise from everyone both sides how I handled the situation ! Wait a minute except his dad who basically full on wanted a fight ( now I’m not a run away back downer ) by lots of kids about etc etc it just became very ugly with the other parents from both sides basically defusing ( dragging him away ) situation in the end there had to be about 20 adults involved in all this . Remember this was u15s, he obviously never played for us again .

kept running it until we got to u18s I lasted 3 games every game there was full on altercations both with players and parents , actually got to one team outside Bristol for Gloucestershire cup game pulled up in minibus to be verbally abused by players and parents before we even got to changing room , Bristol this Bristol that oh here’s the boys from the big city will show you , unbelievable, that’s was enough for me think I would of ended up assaulting someone is was that bad .

oh by the way the lad I sent off all those years ago sent to prison about 5 years ago for some sort of aggravated violent robbery I seen that coming a while ago - anybody involved in kids football fair play to you and good luck ,such a shame because it can be so rewarding 

Edited November 20, 2023 by redkev

[Silvio Dante]

2 minutes ago, beaverface said:

The age I coach at, we've had 4 teams at the same age level for a number of years all moving up year after year, and you can pretty much guarantee that in all that time, the teams we've played in the lower divisions contained some really nice players and parents, and then the higher you go up the divisions, and the higher the standard, the worse they become.

I don't know if the players become more strong willed, or have win at all cost mentality? But the intensity is definitely there.

One thing I have noticed, is that the lower down the leagues you go, the players tend to have multiple interests. So you'll have players who are into climbing, cricket, athletics, kick-boxing, BMXing. Basically other interests outside of football, whereas the top divisions, have players who are pretty much focused on football and football only. I'm also aware of some teams who won't have players play for them, unless they play for a County side also.

I’ve long thought a team is a reflection of the coach at youth football. To me, of course I want to win, but it’s secondary to the teams development as people. We’re at U12 now and have had pretty much the same group since age 7/8 - one addition on each of the last two seasons because they were school friends of existing players as opposed to getting them in based on ability. It’s the whole “no *********” rule - they have to fit with the group ethos.

It is difficult sometimes - I’ve turned away players (or said they can train only to start with until there is a space) when I know they are very good footballers and will improve the team. Against that, if I got them in it means less playing time for the kid who’s been with me since seven and is part of the team. So I come down on that kids side every time.

I guess what I’m saying is that you can have a side in the higher levels of youth football where the kids/parents are still nice and play genuine. But it needs the parents to really buy into it and as a coach, you need to be totally up front with what you’re doing and why. It’ll certainly mean more to me if we win something with a group I’ve taken through than with a cherrypicked squad.

[redkev]

16 minutes ago, beaverface said:

I've had parents refuse to run the line because, in their words, they don't understand the rules of the game, and yet they're more than happy to complain to me about why x is playing instead of their son, any why is so in so in that position over their son. Some parents definitely put their children on pedestals !!

 

100% agree with everything you say ,   We had one parent who basically never came to watch his son only his wife came he turned once to watch him and when I subbed him , shouted up the line how come you didn’t take your son off then , typical parent at football

[Silvio Dante]

12 minutes ago, redkev said:

100% agree with everything you say ,   We had one parent who basically never came to watch his son only his wife came he turned once to watch him and when I subbed him , shouted up the line how come you didn’t take your son off then , typical parent at football

I’ve got an easy solution to that one, my sons the goalkeeper

[REDOXO]

31 minutes ago, redkev said:

I ran / coached a youth team in Bristol from u11s right through to u18s and this was over 10 years ago I finished .

up until u14 all was ok with parents / players etc then as the age went up u15 u/16 then up to u18 the behaviour definitely got a lot worse very quickly . 
Couple of things I can remember one game I had to referee ( no problem ) short story and all that one of our own players was skating on thin ice was just about to get my assistant at the club to sub him and he just had to go ( won’t tell you what he done . Everyone agreed he had to go come off got praise from everyone both sides how I handled the situation ! Wait a minute except his dad who basically full on wanted a fight ( now I’m not a run away back downer ) by lots of kids about etc etc it just became very ugly with the other parents from both sides basically defusing ( dragging him away ) situation in the end there had to be about 20 adults involved in all this . Remember this was u15s, he obviously never played for us again .

kept running it until we got to u18s I lasted 3 games every game there was full on altercations both with players and parents , actually got to one team outside Bristol for Gloucestershire cup game pulled up in minibus to be verbally abused by players and parents before we even got to changing room , Bristol this Bristol that oh here’s the boys from the big city will show you , unbelievable, that’s was enough for me think I would of ended up assaulting someone is was that bad .

oh by the way the lad I sent off all those years ago sent to prison about 5 years ago for some sort of aggravated violent robbery I seen that coming a while ago - anybody involved in kids football fair play to you and good luck ,such a shame because it can be so rewarding 

Yes. Absolutely with the age groups!

My friend was Chairman of a certain boys league and I refereed a lot of games for them over many years once maybe twice a month to help out. 
 

In the end I packed thekids game up completely as it was a constant battle with gobby kids gobbier parents and blokes who were wannabe football managers, giving a terrible example to children, who thought part of the refs fiver/tenner included listening to their bollox. 
 

Not sure what it’s like today but seems about the same with a lot less teams. I wonder why!!?
 

 

[ciderwithtommy]

Funniest of all is that the lower down the footballing pyramid you go, and looking at the report that league will be full of dross players, the expectation of a “perfect” or mistake less refs for lads who likely make mistakes on the pitch every 20 seconds, is just pitiful. 
 

please I beg refs to start calling out all the players mistakes and rinsing them, I’d pay to watch it. I know this is tongue in cheek, but that report is so sad to read. 

[Midred]

4 hours ago, Port Said Red said:

A good excuse to air the lyrics of HMHB's - The Referees Alphabet.

I have highlighted some of the bits I feel are most relevant to the discussion.

The A is for my authority which many players seem to question, thinking they're somehow going to make me change my mind

B is for babies which a lot of managers cry like after a decision has not gone their way

C is for the continual criticism I receive from the touchline... get back in your technical area!

D is for the dunderheads who seem to think we have a conspiracy against their particular team

E is for the eery silence that echoes around the ground after I've booked the home teams player and its obvious to everyone that he deserved it

F is the farce into which most games would descend if we weren't there

The G is for the gnarled face of someone who's on £90, 000 a week and reckoned he should have had a throw in

H is for handball which has to be intentional and very rarely is if only people would study the rules more

I is for innocence, pleaded by many a doe-eyed defender after they've just scythed down that tricky winger

J is for ju-jitsu, which i quite intend to display given a dark alley and some of the narky blerts I've encountered

K is for the kissing of the badge how ridiculous that looks 6 months later when they're at another club

L is for lip reading, at which you don't need to be an expert to see how odious some people are

M is for the mistakes we sometimes make surely a bit of controversy is part of the games appeal

The N, the N is for the numbskull who during the boxing day game asks me what else i got for christmas besides my whistle..... an afternoon with your wife mate

The O is for offside which many forwards tell me they simply could not have been

The P is for the penalty shootout great drama and no pressure on me

Q is the quiet word i sometimes need to have with some of the more fiery participants i usually choose the word 'pleat'

R is for running backwards a difficult skill which the pundits never seem to appreciate

S is for the suggestion that i should have awarded a card of some sort to a player who's just been awarded a free kick. Sorry i got all that wrong the S again.

Okay the S, the S is the suggestion that i should show a card to an opponent by a player whos been awarded a free kick he himself is more in danger of getting one for that

T is for the 21 man brawl which is basically an embarrassing scene of pushing and shoving

U is for the umpire which i sometimes wish id been instead you never hear a cricket crowd shouting whos the bastard in the hat

The V is for vitriol vilification vendetta and volley of verbal abuse

some good bird noises there by the way

W is for Walter Pidgeon who's Mr Griffiths in 'How Green was my Valley' i  may have started to sound like during this song

'where was the light i thought to see in your eye?'

he says that to a young Huw played by Roddy McDowall

The X

The X represents the sarcastic kiss planted on my forehead by the swarthy Portuguese center half who i just dismissed

The Y is for Yate, the kind of town referees come from

And the Z

Well the Z could be for Zidane, Zico, Zola, Zubizaretta, Zoff

Even Zondervan

but is in fact for the zest with which we approach our work

without this zest for the game we wouldn't become refs

and without refs, well zero

See also Zatopek, Zeus

and Zeal Monachorum

I have a caravan there

static naturally

Wouldn't it be fun if the gave the ref a gun

The P is taking the P rather than awarding a penalty at AG?

[spudski]

7 hours ago, Major Isewater said:

I don’t find this ‘funny’ I’m afraid. Those players are bullies and imbeciles. Let’s say no one wants to referee their matches in the future they are , like Camilla , royally screwed. 
Ref’s, especially at the lower levels, give up their free time for the love of the game. Would you if you had to endure even half of what these people put up with? 

Hence my above comment re age. It seems many have been wooshed by it. But wish to ignore that. 

[italian dave]

2 hours ago, spudski said:

Hence my above comment re age. It seems many have been wooshed by it. But wish to ignore that. 

I realise you didn’t find it funny, and made that comment about age. But the tweeter (is that what they’re called?) did describe it as “funny”. I think that’s what people on here referred to, not you! 

[PHILINFRANCE]

10 hours ago, cidered abroad said:

A very sad indictment of how referees are treated by so many players and supporters. It's a wonder that there are any willing to referee matches at any level.

I know it's a few years ago now, but can you imagine Len Fricker putting up with that or, indeed, anybody adopting that attitude towards him?

[spudski]

19 minutes ago, italian dave said:

I realise you didn’t find it funny, and made that comment about age. But the tweeter (is that what they’re called?) did describe it as “funny”. I think that’s what people on here referred to, not you! 

Cheers Dave, appreciated. 

What crossed my mind with the comments re it being offensive etc, and how it's remarkable there are people willing to referee these days, it just goes to show how much more sensitive we are these days. 

I'm not saying it's right, but when growing up as a teenager playing youth football and then into men's football, this would have been seen as tame. 

Times have changed. 

[Steve Watts]

13 hours ago, spudski said:

Cheers Dave, appreciated. 

What crossed my mind with the comments re it being offensive etc, and how it's remarkable there are people willing to referee these days, it just goes to show how much more sensitive we are these days. 

I'm not saying it's right, but when growing up as a teenager playing youth football and then into men's football, this would have been seen as tame. 

Times have changed. 

I don't think it shows how sensitive we've become at all. Enlightened, maybe, but not sensitive. We're living in an age now where people are happy to call out shit like that for what it is. Bullying and massively disrespectful. 

There's just no need for it. Obviously there are also still plenty of throwbacks who like to throw the word snowflake around to anyone who would want to call out people for being dicks. Many of these hark back to the seventies as the "good old days". I was born at the tail end so don't remember any of the decade and am told that the 80's were far tamer than the seventies. If that's the case I'm glad to have been born at the end of the decade!

Times have indeed changed, and mostly for the better. Society is more tolerant, but that's countered by social media giving a global voice to all and as always, the negative shout louder.

[spudski]

1 hour ago, Steve Watts said:

I don't think it shows how sensitive we've become at all. Enlightened, maybe, but not sensitive. We're living in an age now where people are happy to call out shit like that for what it is. Bullying and massively disrespectful. 

There's just no need for it. Obviously there are also still plenty of throwbacks who like to throw the word snowflake around to anyone who would want to call out people for being dicks. Many of these hark back to the seventies as the "good old days". I was born at the tail end so don't remember any of the decade and am told that the 80's were far tamer than the seventies. If that's the case I'm glad to have been born at the end of the decade!

Times have indeed changed, and mostly for the better. Society is more tolerant, but that's countered by social media giving a global voice to all and as always, the negative shout louder.

I totally agree. It is bullying. Back in the 70s and 80s, it was normal. 

However...you've only got to watch park football or some levels of amateur football to see it's not gone away. 

In fact I'd say parents on the sidelines are far worse these days. 

The players more respectful, but imo parents are ridiculous in their expectations and too vociferous. 

As for society being more tolerant. On some things, I'd agree, on others I'd disagree with. 

An element of society have become ' enlightened' and will no longer except other peoples point of view. If it's different, you are shouted down, or put in a relevent box that distinguishes you as ' not worthy'. 

I'll get totally roasted for posting this because of the broadcaster and interviewer. 

But if people are willing...listen to what this author who's studied the subject says about our tolerant/non tolerant society. 

Que...the usual suspects...