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Posts posted by Calculus
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You forgot to say what your mate is called.
If he is called Les, then this is 'very funny'. If your mate is called Caroline, it doesn't work.
DON'T be disheartened, BigTone, keep trying.
TFR
xxx
Unless Caroline is a 'les'.
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.... and then the there was the sad death of an old, God-fearing Yorkshirewoman.
The family had decided on the inscription for the headstone' She Was Thine' but when they got to the burial they saw that the mason had carved 'She Was Thin'.
The poor husband called the mason afterwards and complained that he'd missed the E. The mason was very apologetic and promised to put it right.
Sure enough, when the husband visited the grave the next week he found: 'Ee, She Was Thin'.
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A Yorkshireman's dog dies and as it was a favourite pet he decides to have a gold statue made by a jeweller to remember the dog by.
Yorkshireman: "Can tha mek us a gold statue of yon dog?"
Jeweller: "Do you want it 18 carat?"
Yorkshireman: "No I want it chewin' a bone, yer daft b****r!"
Ee I don't know.
As a son of the broad acres myself this reminded me of the two Yorkshiremen who were getting nostalgic about how much better things used to be.
"...... and there were no such thing as paedophiles in our day" said the first.
"No - we 'ad to buy us own sweets" came the sorrowful reply ...
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Of course we're going up, and as Champions as well. It's not that our competition are Real Madrid - we're talking about a club without a manager, an even more unfortunate club with a manger who's names Hollowhead and finally Swindon Town.
We're lucky to have two two homes games to come, and we can start the winning run on Friday, at the Gate with a good crowd under floodlights. Always seem to get a better atmosphere at night games and now's the time to make sure that Friday's no exception. (If it isn't a Red and White night, it should be, but then so should every game be).
As for age, I'm 51 - that age beyond cynicism, where senilty sets in and second childhoods start.
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Peacock has scored 14 so far this and will more than likely finish with around 20 for the season. In addition to this, think about all the hard work he does chasing long balls lumped down channels, closing defenders down etc.. Given all that, seems like one of our best players to me.
Could someone explain to me why this bloke deserves all the slaggings off he gets on this forum?
Obviously, he should be dropped for Leroy. You're having a laugh aren't you?
Written jokes thread
in General Chat
Posted
or alternatively, for those of an even more romantic disposition:
Shall I compare thee to a Summer's Day
or whack it up there straight away?