Pitch Invader

[SomeRandomBristolian]

2 hours ago, Person X said:

Hello. I don’t know if this is a good idea to post, but I’m the dad of the child - my son, Jay (not his real name) - that ran onto the pitch in the early stages of the match. First and foremost, I want to offer a profound apology to you all, to every fan, the players and clubs for Jay’s actions. I’d like to try and provide some context, if you’ll let me, to help explain what happened and why. 
 

Jay has just turned 11. He has autism and is suffering from PTSD after 3 years of physical abuse at school, being restrained by teaching staff (which was concealed from us). Both of these conditions create complex issues for Jay, one of which is he is heightened to what he may (incorrectly) perceive of as a threat, causing he to flee. This is what we think happened on Saturday. 

We were enjoying the game and then all of a sudden, he said he needed to go to the toilet. I asked him to wait and then before I knew it, he said ‘I’m going to the toilet’, for up and walked down the steps. I was about to go after him and then - out of nowhere, he turned and jumped the barrier. We were stocked and horrified. We couldn’t believe it. I tried to shout to him but he couldn’t hear me. At that point, I was really worried for him. He didn’t know what he was doing. As I ran to jump the barrier, I saw him fall. I (worryingly) thought he’d be tackled and - rightly or wrongly - I got protective of my little boy. When I got to him, he was petrified. I said ‘it’s ok I’ve got you’ turned to get him off the pitch but the Rotherham fans were shouting hateful comments, threats and abuse at him. Again, I should have reacted much better, but I responded to protect my child. I know it doesn’t look like he was scared - we do not condone he sticking his finger up - but this is a know protective response from children with disabilities like Jay. I felt exposed and vulnerable myself and so went into ‘fight’ mode. To be honest, it’s all blur. I was saying to him ‘it’s ok, I’ll get you out of here’. 
 

The stewards tried to direct me off the other side of the pitch but I was worried about my eldest son, who was all alone in the stand. I just ran off and left him. He was so scared too. The stewards then grabbed me and I tried to say I’m just protecting Jay. 
 

Again, I am sorry deeply sorry to you all. This shouldn’t have happened and I take full responsibility. I’m sorry. My family are devastated, for lots of reasons, about what happened. I’m worried about my job, Jay being identified and targeted. The ongoing social media hate is really hard to deal with. I get why people are so angry. Football is precious and match days are special and to be treated as such. What Jay did was not acceptable but I hope, by posting this, you might be able to understand it more. This was about disabilities and the difficulty of managing them daily. I messed up and let Jay down. It will take me a long time to get over this. As his father I must do better. 
 

Please accept my apologies. 
 

Thank you for sharing this. Really brave to come on here share this. It makes a lot of sense now, and gives some us some context behind what happpened. I hope you and both of your sons are now doing ok. I really hope your son gets all the support he needs. 

Edited April 28 by SomeRandomBristolian

[W-S-M Seagull]

47 minutes ago, The Constant Rabbit said:

As a thought - maybe arrange a meeting with the club and see if there is an option they can provide, that if 'Jay' gets unwell again, there is somewhere quiet at AG you can go for a brief time-out until he settles.

 

You probably aren't the only parent at AG with an autistic child, and I'm sure those parents would appreciate a 'quiet room' as well if needed.

Personally I would absolutely love for there to be a seating section that is for neurodiverse people and their carers. Somewhere that is accessible, safe and secure with a quiet room attached. With a policy of zero tolerance of bad behaviour from the carers. 

The club have done a fantastic with the facilities for the less abled. Now it needs to do more for those with less visible disabilities. 

This while situation would have been avoided if we had the facilities I've mentioned above. Other clubs do it. So we should too. 

Ashton Gate should be an inclusive stadium for all and it hurts me that it currently isn't. 

This thread has really hurt my heart that this father was in this position. As soon as I saw the father run on the pitch I knew this wasn't a typical pitch invasion. 

 

Edited April 28 by W-S-M Seagull

[TinMan's left peg]

7 hours ago, W-S-M Seagull said:

Personally I would absolutely love for there to be a seating section that is for neurodiverse people and their carers. Somewhere that is accessible, safe and secure with a quiet room attached. With a policy of zero tolerance of bad behaviour from the carers. 

The club have done a fantastic with the facilities for the less abled. Now it needs to do more for those with less visible disabilities. 

This while situation would have been avoided if we had the facilities I've mentioned above. Other clubs do it. So we should too. 

Ashton Gate should be an inclusive stadium for all and it hurts me that it currently isn't. 

This thread has really hurt my heart that this father was in this position. As soon as I saw the father run on the pitch I knew this wasn't a typical pitch invasion. 

 

Yes that was my first thought too.  Hopefully the club and police handle this sensitively and compassionately.  As you say lots of clubs have sensory areas for fans with various neurodiversity needs.  We need to up our game.  
 

https://www.versus.uk.com/articles/arsenals-sensory-room-allowed-an-autistic-fan-to-watch-their-first-ever-premier-league-game

[Sir Colby-Tit]

19 hours ago, Back of the Dolman said:

It didn’t surprise me that the steward was unable to stop him !

Guy was useless, I spent a fair part of the pre match build up directing people to where they were sitting as he didn’t have a clue.

Luckily there were no serious or important issues that he had to deal with as I doubt very much whether he’d of been any use.

The only thing he did achieve was pulling the veil off the wedding dress which has caused the discussion of whether it was a tutu or a wedding dress

Tutu?

I thought it was tunil?

[Bris Red]

11 hours ago, Person X said:

Hello. I don’t know if this is a good idea to post, but I’m the dad of the child - my son, Jay (not his real name) - that ran onto the pitch in the early stages of the match. First and foremost, I want to offer a profound apology to you all, to every fan, the players and clubs for Jay’s actions. I’d like to try and provide some context, if you’ll let me, to help explain what happened and why. 
 

Jay has just turned 11. He has autism and is suffering from PTSD after 3 years of physical abuse at school, being restrained by teaching staff (which was concealed from us). Both of these conditions create complex issues for Jay, one of which is he is heightened to what he may (incorrectly) perceive of as a threat, causing he to flee. This is what we think happened on Saturday. 

We were enjoying the game and then all of a sudden, he said he needed to go to the toilet. I asked him to wait and then before I knew it, he said ‘I’m going to the toilet’, for up and walked down the steps. I was about to go after him and then - out of nowhere, he turned and jumped the barrier. We were stocked and horrified. We couldn’t believe it. I tried to shout to him but he couldn’t hear me. At that point, I was really worried for him. He didn’t know what he was doing. As I ran to jump the barrier, I saw him fall. I (worryingly) thought he’d be tackled and - rightly or wrongly - I got protective of my little boy. When I got to him, he was petrified. I said ‘it’s ok I’ve got you’ turned to get him off the pitch but the Rotherham fans were shouting hateful comments, threats and abuse at him. Again, I should have reacted much better, but I responded to protect my child. I know it doesn’t look like he was scared - we do not condone he sticking his finger up - but this is a know protective response from children with disabilities like Jay. I felt exposed and vulnerable myself and so went into ‘fight’ mode. To be honest, it’s all blur. I was saying to him ‘it’s ok, I’ll get you out of here’. 
 

The stewards tried to direct me off the other side of the pitch but I was worried about my eldest son, who was all alone in the stand. I just ran off and left him. He was so scared too. The stewards then grabbed me and I tried to say I’m just protecting Jay. 
 

Again, I am sorry deeply sorry to you all. This shouldn’t have happened and I take full responsibility. I’m sorry. My family are devastated, for lots of reasons, about what happened. I’m worried about my job, Jay being identified and targeted. The ongoing social media hate is really hard to deal with. I get why people are so angry. Football is precious and match days are special and to be treated as such. What Jay did was not acceptable but I hope, by posting this, you might be able to understand it more. This was about disabilities and the difficulty of managing them daily. I messed up and let Jay down. It will take me a long time to get over this. As his father I must do better. 
 

Please accept my apologies. 
 

Fair play for coming on and sharing that, as others have said takes a huge amount of courage to do so.

Certainly a lesson to many that as a society we really shouldn't be so quick to judge / condemn others without knowing the full story of such situations. 

[W-S-M Seagull]

1 hour ago, TinMan's left peg said:

Yes that was my first thought too.  Hopefully the club and police handle this sensitively and compassionately.  As you say lots of clubs have sensory areas for fans with various neurodiversity needs.  We need to up our game.  
 

https://www.versus.uk.com/articles/arsenals-sensory-room-allowed-an-autistic-fan-to-watch-their-first-ever-premier-league-game

I will be mortified if in this instance they issue a ban. Any such ban in these circumstances would not look good and would be open to a legal challenge so I hope they do the right thing and offer this father support so that they can attend safely in the future. 

Whilst the club do some fantastic things off of the pitch and if you contact them on a 1-1 basis they can be really helpful, but by and large it is shocking that in 2024 we do so little to support our neurodiverse fanbase to attend matches. 

I do accept that maybe the funding isn't there etc but if we truly want to be the community club we try to portray ourselves to be then we really must do better for all. 

Caring costs nothing. 

Edited April 29 by W-S-M Seagull

[Davefevs]

9 hours ago, W-S-M Seagull said:

Personally I would absolutely love for there to be a seating section that is for neurodiverse people and their carers. Somewhere that is accessible, safe and secure with a quiet room attached. With a policy of zero tolerance of bad behaviour from the carers. 

The club have done a fantastic with the facilities for the less abled. Now it needs to do more for those with less visible disabilities. 

This while situation would have been avoided if we had the facilities I've mentioned above. Other clubs do it. So we should too. 

Ashton Gate should be an inclusive stadium for all and it hurts me that it currently isn't. 

This thread has really hurt my heart that this father was in this position. As soon as I saw the father run on the pitch I knew this wasn't a typical pitch invasion. 

 

Very true.

The facilities for Joe and me are great in A4.  A little waiting room (very warm in winter) before going outside, our own toilets and a single row of seats / cater positions for an unobstructed view.

[BillGill01]

11 hours ago, Person X said:

Hello. I don’t know if this is a good idea to post, but I’m the dad of the child - my son, Jay (not his real name) - that ran onto the pitch in the early stages of the match. First and foremost, I want to offer a profound apology to you all, to every fan, the players and clubs for Jay’s actions. I’d like to try and provide some context, if you’ll let me, to help explain what happened and why. 
 

Jay has just turned 11. He has autism and is suffering from PTSD after 3 years of physical abuse at school, being restrained by teaching staff (which was concealed from us). Both of these conditions create complex issues for Jay, one of which is he is heightened to what he may (incorrectly) perceive of as a threat, causing he to flee. This is what we think happened on Saturday. 

We were enjoying the game and then all of a sudden, he said he needed to go to the toilet. I asked him to wait and then before I knew it, he said ‘I’m going to the toilet’, for up and walked down the steps. I was about to go after him and then - out of nowhere, he turned and jumped the barrier. We were stocked and horrified. We couldn’t believe it. I tried to shout to him but he couldn’t hear me. At that point, I was really worried for him. He didn’t know what he was doing. As I ran to jump the barrier, I saw him fall. I (worryingly) thought he’d be tackled and - rightly or wrongly - I got protective of my little boy. When I got to him, he was petrified. I said ‘it’s ok I’ve got you’ turned to get him off the pitch but the Rotherham fans were shouting hateful comments, threats and abuse at him. Again, I should have reacted much better, but I responded to protect my child. I know it doesn’t look like he was scared - we do not condone he sticking his finger up - but this is a know protective response from children with disabilities like Jay. I felt exposed and vulnerable myself and so went into ‘fight’ mode. To be honest, it’s all blur. I was saying to him ‘it’s ok, I’ll get you out of here’. 
 

The stewards tried to direct me off the other side of the pitch but I was worried about my eldest son, who was all alone in the stand. I just ran off and left him. He was so scared too. The stewards then grabbed me and I tried to say I’m just protecting Jay. 
 

Again, I am sorry deeply sorry to you all. This shouldn’t have happened and I take full responsibility. I’m sorry. My family are devastated, for lots of reasons, about what happened. I’m worried about my job, Jay being identified and targeted. The ongoing social media hate is really hard to deal with. I get why people are so angry. Football is precious and match days are special and to be treated as such. What Jay did was not acceptable but I hope, by posting this, you might be able to understand it more. This was about disabilities and the difficulty of managing them daily. I messed up and let Jay down. It will take me a long time to get over this. As his father I must do better. 
 

Please accept my apologies. 
 

Like many others I am very moved by your post and have joined this forum briefly just to offer a message of support.

The episode must have been so stressful for you and your sons and I would suggest not beating yourself up too much about the way you handled it. I doubt too many of us, despite being very quick to judge, would have done much better.

The inconvenience experienced by other fans in the stadium is insignificant compared to the difficulty you faced. To put your “crime” into context, we saw the other pitch invader at the bar after the game and he was being treated as a minor celebrity. It’s safe to say he won’t be losing any sleep about his indiscretion, which unlike yours was frivolous and premeditated.

I hope you can move forward with a clear conscience and chalk this up as just another daily challenge you have dealt with. The most important thing in that moment was to be there for your son - which you were.

[Davefevs]

Lovely post @BillGill01

[spudski]

12 hours ago, Person X said:

Hello. I don’t know if this is a good idea to post, but I’m the dad of the child - my son, Jay (not his real name) - that ran onto the pitch in the early stages of the match. First and foremost, I want to offer a profound apology to you all, to every fan, the players and clubs for Jay’s actions. I’d like to try and provide some context, if you’ll let me, to help explain what happened and why. 
 

Jay has just turned 11. He has autism and is suffering from PTSD after 3 years of physical abuse at school, being restrained by teaching staff (which was concealed from us). Both of these conditions create complex issues for Jay, one of which is he is heightened to what he may (incorrectly) perceive of as a threat, causing he to flee. This is what we think happened on Saturday. 

We were enjoying the game and then all of a sudden, he said he needed to go to the toilet. I asked him to wait and then before I knew it, he said ‘I’m going to the toilet’, for up and walked down the steps. I was about to go after him and then - out of nowhere, he turned and jumped the barrier. We were stocked and horrified. We couldn’t believe it. I tried to shout to him but he couldn’t hear me. At that point, I was really worried for him. He didn’t know what he was doing. As I ran to jump the barrier, I saw him fall. I (worryingly) thought he’d be tackled and - rightly or wrongly - I got protective of my little boy. When I got to him, he was petrified. I said ‘it’s ok I’ve got you’ turned to get him off the pitch but the Rotherham fans were shouting hateful comments, threats and abuse at him. Again, I should have reacted much better, but I responded to protect my child. I know it doesn’t look like he was scared - we do not condone he sticking his finger up - but this is a know protective response from children with disabilities like Jay. I felt exposed and vulnerable myself and so went into ‘fight’ mode. To be honest, it’s all blur. I was saying to him ‘it’s ok, I’ll get you out of here’. 
 

The stewards tried to direct me off the other side of the pitch but I was worried about my eldest son, who was all alone in the stand. I just ran off and left him. He was so scared too. The stewards then grabbed me and I tried to say I’m just protecting Jay. 
 

Again, I am sorry deeply sorry to you all. This shouldn’t have happened and I take full responsibility. I’m sorry. My family are devastated, for lots of reasons, about what happened. I’m worried about my job, Jay being identified and targeted. The ongoing social media hate is really hard to deal with. I get why people are so angry. Football is precious and match days are special and to be treated as such. What Jay did was not acceptable but I hope, by posting this, you might be able to understand it more. This was about disabilities and the difficulty of managing them daily. I messed up and let Jay down. It will take me a long time to get over this. As his father I must do better. 
 

Please accept my apologies. 
 

Thanks for taking the time to clarify.

Apologies for posting the filmed tweet and making a joke of it. 

I hope there are no repercussions for you and your son.

All the best fellow red

[Breezy]

To Person X,

I'm really sorry to read about your experience on Saturday. I was sat directly opposite in the Lansdown and thought at the time that once you'd come on the pitch, it wasn't just a straight forward case of a kiddie trying to impress his mates. I can't imagine how stressful it must have been. 

Please don't be too harsh on yourself, you can't anticipate everything that a child might do, and that's especially true when a child is neurodiverse. Even if you feel mortified now, you did the natural thing in going on to try and make sure your son was as okay as possible in the circumstances.

If you haven't done so already, then I would contact the club and/or Jerry, the SLO and explain the background to Saturday. I know that in the past the club have invited people in for meetings when there have been issues, and they look to avoid bans where possible, certainly with kiddies.

Please go easy on yourself - you're obviously a good dad who cares about his kids. I hope you're all doing okay and that you're back at the Gate next season.

 

 

[phantom]

11 hours ago, The Constant Rabbit said:

If all this is true (and I have no reason to think it isn't) this is probably one case of pitch invasion the club can let slide without a banning order.

 

Your employers won't sack you if this is on the level - the PR fallout would be terrible for them.

 

As a thought - maybe arrange a meeting with the club and see if there is an option they can provide, that if 'Jay' gets unwell again, there is somewhere quiet at AG you can go for a brief time-out until he settles.

 

You probably aren't the only parent at AG with an autistic child, and I'm sure those parents would appreciate a 'quiet room' as well if needed.

 

Good Luck to you.

 

PS: If this post is just you trying to dodge a ban and the sack, then I can assure you the fallout from lying about having an autistic kid will be 20 times worse!

 

I'm sure you are telling the truth though - all the best.

I can vouch for this person and can confirm it is all as they say

I know they have reached out to the SC&T and have also been in contact with the club, it is not for me to say anymore on this, but @Person X may be able to provide an update at a later stage

10 hours ago, W-S-M Seagull said:

Personally I would absolutely love for there to be a seating section that is for neurodiverse people and their carers. Somewhere that is accessible, safe and secure with a quiet room attached. With a policy of zero tolerance of bad behaviour from the carers. 

The club have done a fantastic with the facilities for the less abled. Now it needs to do more for those with less visible disabilities. 

This while situation would have been avoided if we had the facilities I've mentioned above. Other clubs do it. So we should too. 

Ashton Gate should be an inclusive stadium for all and it hurts me that it currently isn't. 

This thread has really hurt my heart that this father was in this position. As soon as I saw the father run on the pitch I knew this wasn't a typical pitch invasion. 

 

I am sorry to keep quoting the meetings the SC&T are having with the club about improving the fan experience.

I know sensory rooms have been mentioned recently, I hate to admit but I have no knowledge if they are what you are referring to, but discussions are taking place about them and they are very much on the radar of the club

[oldstandrobin]

On 27/04/2024 at 19:03, Curr Avon said:

The first was by an under 12, who was probably overexcited.

The second by a man in his 30s, who looked 'heavily sedated' and was wearing a wedding dress.

Can City show discretion in either case? Or will both face automatic stadium bans, and for how long?

some people get all the luck 

[TV Tom]

17 hours ago, Person X said:

Hello. I don’t know if this is a good idea to post, but I’m the dad of the child - my son, Jay (not his real name) - that ran onto the pitch in the early stages of the match. First and foremost, I want to offer a profound apology to you all, to every fan, the players and clubs for Jay’s actions. I’d like to try and provide some context, if you’ll let me, to help explain what happened and why. 
 

Jay has just turned 11. He has autism and is suffering from PTSD after 3 years of physical abuse at school, being restrained by teaching staff (which was concealed from us). Both of these conditions create complex issues for Jay, one of which is he is heightened to what he may (incorrectly) perceive of as a threat, causing he to flee. This is what we think happened on Saturday. 

We were enjoying the game and then all of a sudden, he said he needed to go to the toilet. I asked him to wait and then before I knew it, he said ‘I’m going to the toilet’, for up and walked down the steps. I was about to go after him and then - out of nowhere, he turned and jumped the barrier. We were stocked and horrified. We couldn’t believe it. I tried to shout to him but he couldn’t hear me. At that point, I was really worried for him. He didn’t know what he was doing. As I ran to jump the barrier, I saw him fall. I (worryingly) thought he’d be tackled and - rightly or wrongly - I got protective of my little boy. When I got to him, he was petrified. I said ‘it’s ok I’ve got you’ turned to get him off the pitch but the Rotherham fans were shouting hateful comments, threats and abuse at him. Again, I should have reacted much better, but I responded to protect my child. I know it doesn’t look like he was scared - we do not condone he sticking his finger up - but this is a know protective response from children with disabilities like Jay. I felt exposed and vulnerable myself and so went into ‘fight’ mode. To be honest, it’s all blur. I was saying to him ‘it’s ok, I’ll get you out of here’. 
 

The stewards tried to direct me off the other side of the pitch but I was worried about my eldest son, who was all alone in the stand. I just ran off and left him. He was so scared too. The stewards then grabbed me and I tried to say I’m just protecting Jay. 
 

Again, I am sorry deeply sorry to you all. This shouldn’t have happened and I take full responsibility. I’m sorry. My family are devastated, for lots of reasons, about what happened. I’m worried about my job, Jay being identified and targeted. The ongoing social media hate is really hard to deal with. I get why people are so angry. Football is precious and match days are special and to be treated as such. What Jay did was not acceptable but I hope, by posting this, you might be able to understand it more. This was about disabilities and the difficulty of managing them daily. I messed up and let Jay down. It will take me a long time to get over this. As his father I must do better. 
 

Please accept my apologies. 
 

Fair play to you for clarifying, this must of been very traumatic for all concerned, hopefully it doesn't put you and your boys off from seeing us get promotion next season 

[W-S-M Seagull]

7 hours ago, phantom said:

I can vouch for this person and can confirm it is all as they say

I know they have reached out to the SC&T and have also been in contact with the club, it is not for me to say anymore on this, but @Person X may be able to provide an update at a later stage

I am sorry to keep quoting the meetings the SC&T are having with the club about improving the fan experience.

I know sensory rooms have been mentioned recently, I hate to admit but I have no knowledge if they are what you are referring to, but discussions are taking place about them and they are very much on the radar of the club

It's good to hear its on the table. But I spoke to the club years ago about this at it was on the table back then too. It just seems to have stagnated. We need to see positive steps taken because in 2024 it just isn't acceptable. 

Neurodiversity is very complex by its very nature, i'm still learning every single day. There isn't a one size fits all solution like there is with providing facilities for those that are less abled. 

For example my son uses a sensory room at school multiple times a day. However there will be over people where a sensory room wouldn't suit their needs and they may just prefer a quiet room they can escape to where the match is playing on a TV for example. 

I've noticed the club now sell ear defenders in the club shop which is a tiny step forward. I don't know how much they cost tho. But it would be nice if the club did a scheme where you could borrow a pair for a match as sometimes they can be accidentally left at home. 

I'm sure there are lots of other small things the club could do that wouldn't cost much at all.

[Mattredrobin]

On 28/04/2024 at 21:42, Person X said:

Hello. I don’t know if this is a good idea to post, but I’m the dad of the child - my son, Jay (not his real name) - that ran onto the pitch in the early stages of the match. First and foremost, I want to offer a profound apology to you all, to every fan, the players and clubs for Jay’s actions. I’d like to try and provide some context, if you’ll let me, to help explain what happened and why. 
 

Jay has just turned 11. He has autism and is suffering from PTSD after 3 years of physical abuse at school, being restrained by teaching staff (which was concealed from us). Both of these conditions create complex issues for Jay, one of which is he is heightened to what he may (incorrectly) perceive of as a threat, causing he to flee. This is what we think happened on Saturday. 

We were enjoying the game and then all of a sudden, he said he needed to go to the toilet. I asked him to wait and then before I knew it, he said ‘I’m going to the toilet’, for up and walked down the steps. I was about to go after him and then - out of nowhere, he turned and jumped the barrier. We were stocked and horrified. We couldn’t believe it. I tried to shout to him but he couldn’t hear me. At that point, I was really worried for him. He didn’t know what he was doing. As I ran to jump the barrier, I saw him fall. I (worryingly) thought he’d be tackled and - rightly or wrongly - I got protective of my little boy. When I got to him, he was petrified. I said ‘it’s ok I’ve got you’ turned to get him off the pitch but the Rotherham fans were shouting hateful comments, threats and abuse at him. Again, I should have reacted much better, but I responded to protect my child. I know it doesn’t look like he was scared - we do not condone he sticking his finger up - but this is a know protective response from children with disabilities like Jay. I felt exposed and vulnerable myself and so went into ‘fight’ mode. To be honest, it’s all blur. I was saying to him ‘it’s ok, I’ll get you out of here’. 
 

The stewards tried to direct me off the other side of the pitch but I was worried about my eldest son, who was all alone in the stand. I just ran off and left him. He was so scared too. The stewards then grabbed me and I tried to say I’m just protecting Jay. 
 

Again, I am sorry deeply sorry to you all. This shouldn’t have happened and I take full responsibility. I’m sorry. My family are devastated, for lots of reasons, about what happened. I’m worried about my job, Jay being identified and targeted. The ongoing social media hate is really hard to deal with. I get why people are so angry. Football is precious and match days are special and to be treated as such. What Jay did was not acceptable but I hope, by posting this, you might be able to understand it more. This was about disabilities and the difficulty of managing them daily. I messed up and let Jay down. It will take me a long time to get over this. As his father I must do better. 
 

Please accept my apologies. 
 

Hey man thanks for sharing, very brave to share that with us on here. Must've have been a very scary experience. I think in the circumstances any of us would've have done the same. Hopefully the club are understanding of the situation sending hugs and love to you all. 

[Riaz]

On 28/04/2024 at 21:42, Person X said:

Hello. I don’t know if this is a good idea to post, but I’m the dad of the child - my son, Jay (not his real name) - that ran onto the pitch in the early stages of the match. First and foremost, I want to offer a profound apology to you all, to every fan, the players and clubs for Jay’s actions. I’d like to try and provide some context, if you’ll let me, to help explain what happened and why. 
 

Jay has just turned 11. He has autism and is suffering from PTSD after 3 years of physical abuse at school, being restrained by teaching staff (which was concealed from us). Both of these conditions create complex issues for Jay, one of which is he is heightened to what he may (incorrectly) perceive of as a threat, causing he to flee. This is what we think happened on Saturday. 

We were enjoying the game and then all of a sudden, he said he needed to go to the toilet. I asked him to wait and then before I knew it, he said ‘I’m going to the toilet’, for up and walked down the steps. I was about to go after him and then - out of nowhere, he turned and jumped the barrier. We were stocked and horrified. We couldn’t believe it. I tried to shout to him but he couldn’t hear me. At that point, I was really worried for him. He didn’t know what he was doing. As I ran to jump the barrier, I saw him fall. I (worryingly) thought he’d be tackled and - rightly or wrongly - I got protective of my little boy. When I got to him, he was petrified. I said ‘it’s ok I’ve got you’ turned to get him off the pitch but the Rotherham fans were shouting hateful comments, threats and abuse at him. Again, I should have reacted much better, but I responded to protect my child. I know it doesn’t look like he was scared - we do not condone he sticking his finger up - but this is a know protective response from children with disabilities like Jay. I felt exposed and vulnerable myself and so went into ‘fight’ mode. To be honest, it’s all blur. I was saying to him ‘it’s ok, I’ll get you out of here’. 
 

The stewards tried to direct me off the other side of the pitch but I was worried about my eldest son, who was all alone in the stand. I just ran off and left him. He was so scared too. The stewards then grabbed me and I tried to say I’m just protecting Jay. 
 

Again, I am sorry deeply sorry to you all. This shouldn’t have happened and I take full responsibility. I’m sorry. My family are devastated, for lots of reasons, about what happened. I’m worried about my job, Jay being identified and targeted. The ongoing social media hate is really hard to deal with. I get why people are so angry. Football is precious and match days are special and to be treated as such. What Jay did was not acceptable but I hope, by posting this, you might be able to understand it more. This was about disabilities and the difficulty of managing them daily. I messed up and let Jay down. It will take me a long time to get over this. As his father I must do better. 
 

Please accept my apologies. 
 

No apology needed. 
 

A child runs on to a football pitch. Hardly a crime is it? 

it was obvious, you were trying to protect your child also. We would all do the same.

Hope your boy is okay and hopefully back at city enjoying games soon 

[Steve Watts]

22 minutes ago, Riaz said:

No apology needed. 
 

A child runs on to a football pitch. Hardly a crime is it? 

it was obvious, you were trying to protect your child also. We would all do the same.

Hope your boy is okay and hopefully back at city enjoying games soon 

Well, strictly speaking.....it is!

But....!  Context and mitigating factors are everything and as a father of a newly neurodiverse son I absolutely get how it could happen.  Neurodiverse children can often be very impulsive, through no fault of their own.  Just seems that this impulsivity has taken hold here and shown him the only way out whilst in an automatic fight or flight mode.

Hope he's doing ok, @Person X, as I'm sure "Jay" himself is probably replaying the moment in his head still and I suspect beating himself up over it.

[Baldyman]

On 29/04/2024 at 00:17, W-S-M Seagull said:

Personally I would absolutely love for there to be a seating section that is for neurodiverse people and their carers. Somewhere that is accessible, safe and secure with a quiet room attached. With a policy of zero tolerance of bad behaviour from the carers. 

The club have done a fantastic with the facilities for the less abled. Now it needs to do more for those with less visible disabilities. 

This while situation would have been avoided if we had the facilities I've mentioned above. Other clubs do it. So we should too. 

Ashton Gate should be an inclusive stadium for all and it hurts me that it currently isn't. 

This thread has really hurt my heart that this father was in this position. As soon as I saw the father run on the pitch I knew this wasn't a typical pitch invasion. 

 

Lots of clubs do now have quiet areas for neurodiverse fans / children that are behind glass and containing sensory calming zones . Given the substantial increase in regular attendances over the past two seasons I’d like to think that the club could give attention to this area . 

[Baldyman]

3 minutes ago, Baldyman said:

Lots of clubs do now have quiet areas for neurodiverse fans / children that are behind glass and containing sensory calming zones . Given the substantial increase in regular attendances over the past two seasons I’d like to think that the club could give attention to this area . 

Man City , Chelsea , WBA , Sunderland , Boro , Watford , Rotherham , Arsenal and Tottenham all have them and I’m sure there’s many more . 

[Open End Numb Legs]

This is cautionary example to us all I guess. I wasn't there but can imagine how a crowd would jump to the wrong conclusion, adding to the problem and the stress.

The instinct to protect is very strong, leaving one child to deal with the other must have been very tough.

I was in Cornwall over Easter. Met a family who had lost their 4 year old who had run out of a public toilet into a car park and disappeared. The panic and stress for the parents was easy to see. Roads, cars, incoming tide, sand dunes, cliffs.... several of us, all strangers, helped search the area, fortunately he was found safe along the beach but in that moment of dealing with such a situation your mind is racing.

[Mr Popodopolous]

What I would add. No issue, hope common sense prevails. A natural instinct.

Hopefully the club will see sense and any other relevant bodies the same, but to what extent is it in their hands? By which I mean any risk of an FBO or I dunno what, bring imposed?

Obviously if it was, there is the right of Appeal but the Club at time of verdict, would be duty bound to enforce I expect. Appeal would change that if successful.

A club ban is separate, not Court enforced as such etc.

Hopefully it doesn't reach that point, all parties should act sensibly but this post is a suggested possible scenario.

[Ziderarmy]

You’d hope @JerrySLO has seen this thread and common sense will prevail.